


Pulling My Leg

by damedechance



Category: Naruto
Genre: Community: kakasaku, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:15:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 36,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23356051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/damedechance/pseuds/damedechance
Summary: An AU where Kakashi never taught a genin team, and instead ended up as Tsunade's successor as Hokage. When he meets Sakura, she's already a very established ninja and medic in her own right, and Kakashi can't help but be annoyed by her, a fact that causes Sakura endless amusement.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi
Comments: 83
Kudos: 265





	1. Office call

As the remaining daylight finally waned to all but a sliver of warm bronze on the hardwood floors of his office, Kakashi finally allowed himself to fully slump down in his chair. Granted, being Hokage wasn't much of a deterrent to slumping down in the first place, but as Kakashi could sense the very closely approaching end to his work day, he allowed himself even more reprieve. Whereas before his head had still remained upright despite the omnipresent slouch, now Kakashi had fully crumpled in his chair, with his eyes on the same level as the armrests. His arms had drifted up to allow for his hands to rake over his face and rub forceful circles into both of his eyes. It had been an extremely long day, and none of it having to do with the still insurmountable piles of paperwork on his expansive desk.

After Kakashi let out a guttural groan, he once again opened his eyes to find that the daylight had dissipated even more in the time it took for him to shrink in his chair. He also found the particularly nonplussed stare from Shikamaru, who had just started his rotation as one of Kakashi's many advisors. A few years ago, Kakashi's subordinates had found that their esteemed Hokage was much easier to work with in small doses, and had promptly set up a schedule where each advisor would work one month with him at a time until their next turn came. Only three days ago, Genma had been the one accompanying Kakashi in his office, pushing paperwork, assigning missions, and organizing Kakashi's schedule. It hardly bothered Kakashi any to have a rotating door for assistants. Shikamaru, however, always had such an unpleasant expression on his face, which always served to irritate Kakashi. Especially that day.

"Need anything before I head out, Hokage-sama?" Shikamaru deadpanned. Kakashi could tell the Nara boy was patronizing him just from the way he stood, if the boy's father was any sort of model to go by. That family had such an effortless way of insulting others; it was maddening. Even more maddening was the fact that Kakashi knew the reason why Shikamaru had decided to be so condescending, and Kakashi was absolutely deserving of it. Shikamaru may have been annoying, but he was nothing if not an effectual go-between.

Fat chance if he was going to acknowledge it though. Seemingly unperturbed, Kakashi offered up a sickeningly sweet smile and mentioned the request he had been planning all day in such a flawlessly offhand manner that he knew Shikamaru would see it as what it was: completely fabricated. "Actually, Shikamaru, I would really appreciate it if you could call for one Haruno Sakura. I've heard that she's training to become assistant director of the hospital, and I'd like to go over her mission schedule with her."

Shikamaru raised one eyebrow half a millimeter, seemingly contemplating what the consequences may be if he called his Hokage out on his blatant lie. "Sure, it's on my way home anyway," he shrugged.

Kakashi uttered a very cheerful thanks before finally giving Shikamaru his dismissal, and even though the sharp wave of his hand had lost some of the authority it would have had if Kakashi was upright, Shikamaru took his leave nonetheless. Kakashi slowly turned in his desk chair to look out the floor-to-ceiling windows of the Hokage tower to find Shikamaru's form leaping across rooftops in the direction of the hospital. The sunlight had finally disappeared over the horizon, leaving the pale moon in its place as the sky turned from flaming orange to a muted indigo. Kakashi continued to watch, seemingly relaxed, until he saw Shikamaru disappear once again through one of the hospital windows. Kakashi hoped that it hadn't been the window to a patient's room. He could only imagine the onslaught of paperwork that it would cause.

Satisfied that his assistant had seemingly completed his final task of the day, Kakashi languidly turned around in his chair once again to face the rest of the room. If it were possible, he sank even lower into his chair and lamented the fact that Shikamaru had neglected to turn on the lamp in the corner before he left. Despite the moonlight filtering in from the wide windows, Kakashi's office was still rather dim. If he had any motivation at all to make a dent in some of his paperwork, there was definitely no way that Kakashi would be able to do it now, lest he strain his eyes. Kakashi suspected that Shikamaru had anticipated this result.

Kakashi often took it for granted that, as the leader of hundreds of well-trained shinobi, he never really had to wait very long for messages to get to their recipients. He had to wait even less for those recipients to come at his behest. For some reason, Kakashi's subordinates seemed to be utterly fearful of tardiness when it came to answering to their Hokage. Kakashi just never seemed to extend the same courtesy, his abhorrent punctuality perhaps even more well-known than some other, more honorable aspects of his reputation. Nonetheless, it wasn't long before Kakashi heard a tentative knock at the door to his office followed by an equally timid, "Hokage-sama?"

"Come in," Kakashi groaned from his puddle of goo at the base of his chair.

The young woman walked in, her steps slow and careful as she edged her way around the door. Hesitantly, she closed the door behind her and scanned her eyes across the room, a look of confusion crossing over her pale face and a flash of irritation appearing in her green eyes.

"Down here," the Hokage muttered pitifully.

Sakura, immediately placing the voice, stepped closer to Kakashi's desk and looked down across the stacks of papers and scrolls to find Kakashi's seemingly boneless form. He must have looked absolutely disgraceful, his white Hokage robes pooling around him and his chin tucked against his chest. He smiled warmly at the woman, hoping it may make her more amenable to his impending request.

"You... summoned me, Hokage-sama?" Sakura asked, her tone absolutely bewildered.

Kakashi had only met with the woman directly a handful of times, and perhaps dozens of times for mission debriefings. He had received reports from her mentor, the Godaime, that Haruno Sakura was an exceptional medic and a kunoichi deserving of a place in the bingo books, though her deceivingly slight and feminine appearance caused her opponents to severely underestimate her. Just as Kakashi had rifled through the records of all active shinobi in Konoha and memorized them, the genius Copy Nin had memorized her chart as well. She had been on a genin team along with the Hokage incumbent-to-be, Uzumaki Naruto, and the previously sole survivor of the now extinct Uchiha clan, Uchiha Sasuke. Her team leader had been none other than Mitarashi Anko, and he could only imagine the absolute chaos that squad dynamic would have caused. Nonetheless, Sakura and her team had an impeccable success record, and even after Sasuke had defected from the village, they maintained that success with the previous Anbu ROOT member, Sai. In the Fourth Great Shinobi War, Sakura had played a vital role - both under Kakashi's command and outside of it - in not only defeating some key enemies, but also by healing her fallen comrades. Years after the war, Sakura had seemed to find her own place outside of her team, quickly climbing the ranks in Konoha's hospital - which was flourishing thanks to Tsunade's continued supervision - and setting a reputation as one of the most capable and reliable jonin in the village. Kakashi had even hand picked her to take lead on a few particularly tricky S-class missions, and he had entertained some of her well thought-out proposals for medical research. Tonight, he found himself to be in a predicament that had seemed right up her alley, and when thinking through the list of Konoha medics, it seemed that Sakura was the only real option. Afterall, her security clearance was much higher than most of the medics that were still within the village, and he thought her assistance would be much less embarrassing than that of Tsunade.

"Yes, Sakura, I'm sorry to have bothered you at this hour, but I have a mission for you," Kakashi said. He may have sounded pleasant, but the implied authority in his words was very clear.

Sakura's eyes widened a fraction, and she immediately shifted into a ready stance. It was rare that the Hokage would assign a mission at such an odd hour and request her immediate response, so she knew to expect an urgent threat to the village and be ready to move at a moment's notice. Even if she had just pulled a double shift at the hospital and wanted nothing more than to be at home lounging on her couch with a box of greasy takeout. "I'm ready, Hokage-sama."

Kakashi nodded seriously in acknowledgement, though the effect was lost in the way his chin bobbed against his sternum. "You must know that this objective requires the utmost discretion, and that you are the sole ninja who may be privy to the information I'm about to give you," he said. Upon seeing a steely resolve settle over Sakura's eyes and her gloved fingers clenching into fists, Kakashi continued on soberly: 

"I think I broke my hip."

Sakura blinked.

Then cleared her throat.

And then, all at once, Sakura erupted in a fit of raucous laughter, doubling over and clutching her sides as she squealed. Kakashi looked on, unimpressed and even irritated at the blatant disrespect that his subordinate was displaying. He assumed that being the apprentice of the previous Hokage has rendered her immune to the decorum that his position typically imposed upon lesser shinobi. Regardless, the woman carried on with her bubbling laughter for some time, tears even springing from the corners of her eyes before hastily being whisked away by one dainty finger, and the bright smile splitting her face into two distinct halves. Kakashi felt that admonishing her would only be more trouble than it was worth and simply decided to wait it out, although the pain radiating from his hip was urging him to act soon.

"Sorry, Hokage, hehe, Hokage-sama," Sakura managed to get out around the dissipating giggles. "You just, ha, caught me off guard." Slowly, Sakura straightened from her crouch and rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands to get rid of any lingering tears. With a sniff and a pat of her hands to smooth out her skirt, Sakura looked back at the Hokage with such a serious face that Kakashi felt like he might be able to wipe it off.

"Yes, well, I would appreciate it if you would take a look and heal it," Kakashi said. "Quickly, please," he added with blatant disdain.

Sakura only smirked, "Yes, Hokage-sama, right away. Let's get you to the hospital."

"No need," Kakashi said. "Like I mentioned before, this only stays between the two of us. You'll perform the procedure here."

"You've got to be kidding me," Sakura said as her jaw dropped. "I can't work in a place like this."

This time, it was Kakashi's turn to blink.

Sighing dejectedly, Sakura set to work, seemingly taking her Hokage's lack of response as an order. She started by pulling the lamp from the corner of the room and placing it next to the desk before turning on the light. Immediately, the room was cast in a warm yellow glow. Next, Sakura set about carefully removing the stacks of paper from the desk and placing them in organized piles across the room so that they wouldn't get in her way. Once she was satisfied that the desk was clear, Sakura took off her white lab coat and laid it across the desk.

"Up," Sakura said. She patted the newly covered desk with the back of her hand and looked at Kakashi expectantly.

Absolutely incredulous that one of his own ninja would dare to give him orders, Kakashi scoffed before swinging his chair around so that he could look out the window instead of at her expectant face. Granted, he could only use his uninjured leg for leverage. He figured a life on crutches wouldn't be so bad, afterall.

"C'mon, no need to act like a grumpy old man, Hokage-sama," Sakura said, a glimmer of humor betraying the seriousness in her voice. "I just need to get a good look at the injured area, and this would be more comfortable for you anyway."

Kakashi grunted just before one chakra-infused hand abruptly spun his chair back around with a flourish. Still a little dizzy from the spin, Kakashi came face to face with one of Sakura's sternest glares; one that had set her mouth into a harsh line.

"Hokage-sama, I take my job as medic very seriously and I highly value your continued sacrifice and duty to our village. And it is my personal duty to ensure the safety of my fellow shinobi, so please, allow me to heal you in the best way that I know how given the restrictions you've imposed upon me," Sakura said. Quickly, she added, "Please."

Well, there was no arguing with that, Kakashi decided. Afterall, he knew that in any typical mission, no matter who the team captain was, the medic would always have the final say in ensuring that their team made it home safely. He figured this situation was no different and made a move to get out of his chair, bracing his hands against the armrests. When nothing happened, Kakashi looked pathetically up at his medic. "Ah, it appears that Konohamaru has covered my seat in glue once again."

Rolling her eyes, Sakura placed her hands right under the Hokage's armpits, hefting him up over her head effortlessly with the aid of a little chakra before setting him down carefully on the edge of the desk. Feeling very much like a newborn baby, Kakashi looked over her shoulder helplessly in an attempt to retain the final shreds of dignity he had left, and swallowed a groan of pain before it could escape from his lips. Sakura gingerly helped Kakashi to lie on his back and carefully swung his legs over to rest on the desk. Satisfied with her work, Sakura dusted off her hands.

"Now, which hip is it?" Sakura asked cheerfully.

Kakashi pointed wordlessly to his right hip.

"Ah, and how did this happen, again?" Sakura said as she set to work. She pulled out a roll of medical supplies from the medic bag that was clipped around her waist, just above her pencil skirt. She took out a percussion hammer and began tapping it against strategic points along both his legs. Simultaneously, her unoccupied hand flutter up to his right wrist, feeling for a pulse and probing with chakra to obtain his vital signs.

"That's privileged information," Kakashi sniffed. Absently, he noted that her hands were rather cold, although not entirely unpleasant.

"Ah, well, lucky for you I abide by the laws of doctor-patient confidentiality," Sakura said with a quick wink. "You can tell me anything."

"Nope," Kakashi said. "It's top secret."

For the second time, Sakura rolled her eyes. "Hokage-sama, with all due respect, I am about to have my hand down your pants so if you could please tell me how you obtained this injury it would make the whole process much quicker. If I know how you hurt yourself, I won't have to waste time trying to figure out how to reverse the damage."

Kakashi coughed, his mind quickly flashing to a scene from his favorite Icha Icha volume before coming back to reality just as quickly. "Down my what?" he asked.

"Your pants, Hokage-sama," Sakura said seriously. "I need skin-to-skin contact in order to heal you with my chakra, and my extensive medical research tells me that your broken hip is located directly beneath the top of your pants. I mean, if you don't want my hands under your pants, per se, we can always take them all the way off..."

Noticing that she seemed to be seriously considering that last option, Kakashi interrupted her line of thought. "Under the pants will be just fine. Just... make it quick."

Kakashi directed his gaze dejectedly up at the wooden beams in the ceiling instead of at the cheerful face of his medic as she hummed to herself. He certainly hadn't been expecting such an intimate encounter tonight. He figured it must have been some sort of divine punishment for a bad deed in one of his past lives, or perhaps even one of the deeds from his current life. He supposed the silver lining was that Sakura seemed to have forgotten her other line of questioning towards the origins of his injury. She had put away her percussion hammer and was gently flexing his ankle and foot with both her hands, having taken off his right shoe without him noticing. Seemingly pleased with her initial investigation, Sakura stepped a little closer to his hip and set about lifting Kakashi's sweater to reveal the undershirt that was tucked into his pants. Wordlessly, she pulled the shirt out from under his pants and swiftly began to undo his belt.

"I can do that," Kakashi said hurriedly, swatting her hands away in order to take of his belt. His movements were much slower than hers as he hoped to put off the inevitable: one of his subordinates was about to put her hand down his pants. And not in a fun way. 

"Thank you, Hokage-sama," Sakura chirped before, wasting absolutely no time, she suddenly and unceremoniously dipped her freezing hands right under the waistband of his pants and underwear, one of her palms laying flat against his sore hip and the other hand stretching the edge of his pants down to expose the area of injury.

Sakura hummed, deep in thought as she stared at Kakashi's bare hip. If she were to pull his pants down any further, Kakashi feared she might see something that definitely did not need to be seen, let alone by her. Having lost all hope, Kakashi closed his eyes and decided to black out until the whole ordeal was over.

He wasn't so lucky.

"Now, tell me how this happened," Sakura said sweetly, although the pressure from her hand was increasing the pain in his hip. "I know you have gray hair, but I don't think you're quite old enough for a simple fall to cause a broken hip."

If he didn't know any better, Kakashi might have suspected that she was exploiting his current position to get an answer out of him.

"No," he said.

Sakura sighed. Suddenly, she pushed a little harder and Kakashi winced. "Sorry, Hokage-sama, I have to test the injury to try to determine the extent of it."

Increasingly suspicious, Kakashi made the impulsive decision to answer her. He figured he had already sworn her to secrecy, and nothing could possibly make his current circumstance any more embarrassing. With one final sigh, Kakashi began. "I went training with Gai this morning. We were sparring, and I lost my focus. He swung me into the side of a tree, and my hip took the brunt of the force."

Sakura couldn't help but stifle a giggle as she continued to prod at his hip, seemingly gentler this time. "How did you get here, then?" Sakura asked. All in all, his story wasn't so embarrassing. She wondered why he was so reluctant to tell her. Anyone could lose focus in a friendly spar, it certainly wasn't anything to be ashamed of, even for the Hokage. Spars were more often than not a simple way of expelling energy and stress, and weren't exactly indicative of any true skill.

"He carried me," Kakashi said simply. He risked a glance at her face to catch her reaction.

Ah, there it was. Once again, a grin split across her face as her hand paused over his hip. Sakura turned her head to look directly at him, as if to gauge whether or not he was joking.

"You're pulling my leg," she said.

Kakashi shook his head.

Finally letting out a single snort - Kakashi was thankful it wasn't anything close to her previous fit of giggles - Sakura set back to work, the image of the Green Beast of Konoha himself, Maito Gai, barrelling across rooftops with the Rokudaime riding piggyback, ceremonial white robes billowing in the wind. She tried to memorize the image, hoping to access it in times when she really needed cheering up.

"Well, you're in luck," Sakura said. "Your hip isn't broken."

"It isn't?" Kakashi said. He lifted himself up onto his elbows to look, and then immediately wished he hadn't. The view that greeted his eyes was that of Haruno Sakura's slight and feminine hands resting against his bare flesh, right underneath his pants and horrifyingly close to one of Kakashi's more treasured body parts. Her gloves had been shoved into her medic's pouch, and as innocent as that alone may have seemed, it made Kakashi feel exponentially more mortified.

Sakura slowly slid her hands out from underneath Kakashi's clothes, carefully avoiding jostling his hip as she did so and gently releasing the waistband of his pants so that it wouldn't snap against the sensitive skin. She said, "Nope, but it is dislocated."

Without warning, Sakura effortlessly hefted herself up and onto the desk along with Kakashi, straddling his left leg and lifting his right leg at the knee in one smooth movement. Both of Kakashi's eyes went wide involuntarily, even the eye that he typically kept closed out of habit - the sharingan long gone, though he never could quite get used to using both eyes. Dumbstruck, the Hokage looked up and down at Sakura, noting the look of concentration on her face just as he noticed the way her thighs stretched out the fabric of her skirt in that position. He couldn't help but admire the image, although inwardly he was chastising himself for not reacting and throwing her off, given the fact that their positions were particularly compromising.

Sakura smiled down on him reassuringly, "Don't worry, Hokage-sama, I'll take care of you!"

"Exactly how do you plan on doing that?" Kakashi asked dubiously.

"It's certainly better than sitting at a desk all day with a dislocated hip, I can tell you that much," Sakura said with a bit of venom in her voice. Kakashi suspected that whatever she was about to do would serve as punishment for not seeking medical attention sooner. "Now, count to three, please."

Unsure what else he could do, Kakashi obliged. In a glum tone, he began the countdown. "One.... two--"

Before he could get to three, Sakura had abruptly switched positions, pinning Kakashi down with one of her knees on his pelvis as she simultaneously jerked Kakashi's leg up and towards his chest. With a deafening pop, Kakashi groaned out in a final exclamation of pain before belatedly realizing that his hip was starting to feel normal again, the constant pain fading away and being replaced by only moderate discomfort. Shocked, Kakashi looked up at Sakura to find that she was grinning, this time with pride instead of humor. She cheerfully reached her hand under the waistband of Kakashi's pants once again, though Kakashi's embarrassment was short lived this time as she only kept her hand in place long enough to soothe the area with her medical ninjutsu before pulling away entirely. Gracefully, Sakura flipped herself off of the desk and extended a hand towards the Hokage to help him come to a sitting position, his legs hanging over the edge of his desk.

"I'd say that's one mission completed!" Sakura said. "Thank you for the opportunity, Hokage-sama."

Kakashi was surprised to find that he couldn't help but to be amused. This woman had walked in to his office, seemingly timid although he now suspected it was some sort of ruse. In the span under an hour, this woman had repeatedly undercut him, shocked him, and outright embarrassed him all for the purpose of healing his leg. He had no idea how one person could have such a tempest-like personality, nor how she could maintain it in the presence of a Hokage. He suspected she was simply immune to intimidation, having practiced under Tsunade in the past, but that couldn't account for all of her audacity tonight.

Training to regain back some of his dignity, Kakashi crossed his arms and regarded Sakura with a cold glare. "You're quite headstrong, aren't you?"

Kakashi had intended for his question to come across as criticism, though Sakura merely shrugged. "I had to do what I could in the name of my village and protect the Hokage. Anyway, you should probably keep off that leg as much as you can for a few days. I put it back into place, but it will be fragile for a while. Try to keep from walking as much as possible and no training or other... strenuous activity for a week. Medic's orders."

Lifting an eyebrow at the mention of strenuous activity, Kakashi uncrossed his arms and hopped off his desk, putting himself much closer to Sakura than he would have liked. Dismissively shooing her with a sweeping motion of his hand, Sakura stepped aside to allow him to walk back around his desk - both shoeless and beltless - and in front of his chair. He coughed authoritatively, "That will be all now, Sakura. You may take your leave."

Sakura giggled before reaching across the desk and tugging on his clothes. Just about ready to come to blows, Kakashi prepared to summon Anbu to forcibly take her out of his office, until he felt a slight breeze blow across his ankle. Looking down, he noticed that Sakura had not been trying to grope him like he previously thought. Instead, she had gently tugged one of the edges of his Hokage's robes out from his waistband. It must have gotten stuck in his hurry to get off the desk, and after Sakura had fixed it, the robe had fallen to its regular position to settle somewhere near his ankles. Kakashi took a deep breath and closed his eyes to suppress his unwarranted anger. Despite the fact that Sakura seemed utterly giddy at embarrassing him, Kakashi had to admit that during her entire visit, she hadn't done a single thing that wasn't necessary.

Begrudgingly, Kakashi snatched Sakura's lab coat off of his desk before holding it out to her. "Just go," he said.

Sakura still smiled, "Yes, Hokage-sama."

Without another word, Sakura joyfully skipped out of the office, the door clicking closed behind her softly. Kakashi made a mental note to find some sort of unsavory task to assign her to before he flicked off the light. Disregarding the numerous piles of paperwork on the floor, Kakashi decided it was time for him to finally turn in for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically I've always been intrigued by the Kakashi/Sakura pairing, but the fact that he used to be her teacher doesn't really settle right with me now that I've reached adulthood. So I figured I'd create an AU to explore this pairing and aspects of their (totally crack) relationship.


	2. Heat Wave, Cold War

Konoha was known for a particularly temperate climate. With all of the leafy trees and subsequently plentiful shade, it was a rare day in Konoha when the temperature reached too far above a tolerable level. And it was a rare day, indeed, when Kakashi finally decided to enact his revenge.

Kakashi was an incredibly patient man. He knew how to wait for the perfect moment for whatever plan he had in mind, and often even when there wasn’t a plan at all. Oftentimes, his impeccable patience was to a fault. For instance, in moments where he was supposed to be somewhere and he fell in step behind a slow moving civilian. Or, for example, when he was meant to do something and began doing a favor for someone else. Even today, Kakashi had arrived late for duty to his  _ own _ office, though perhaps not as late as usual considering the fact that he had something to look forward to. Still, Kakashi’s patience was his most well-honed skill.

It was for this reason that it had been weeks since he had last seen one Haruno Sakura. After her late night - ahem - medical check up, Kakashi had found himself irreparably  _ bothered.  _ And the Hokage felt that it was his right to seek reprisal on someone who had wronged him in such a way. And so he waited for the perfect moment. It just so happened that the hottest day of the summer was the ideal day for him to put his plan into motion.

“Shikamaru,” Kakashi called from his desk. It was bright and early in the morning - the sun only halfway from its peak in the sky and still blistering - and Shikamaru was currently standing in the corner trying not to fall asleep. Kakashi could see his eyelids drooping from all the way across the room, even though Shikamaru tried to pass it off as him being deep in thought over stains on the floorboards.

“Huh? Oh, yes Hokage-sama?” Shikamaru said before lifting his head and putting his hands in his pockets. It seemed that he had been waiting for some sort of order to start his day.

“I’d like to start sifting through the hospital’s budget proposals but I seem to have misplaced the quarterly reports,” Kakashi said. “Would you please summon Shizune?”

Shikamaru nodded wordlessly before disappearing with a hand seal and a puff of smoke. As soon as he left, Kakashi pulled out a cardboard box from underneath his desk. A box which just so happened to be bursting open, full of official requests, reports, and financial documents from Konoha’s hospital. Kakashi promptly set the box in a chair which he had pulled up next to his own desk. After doing so, Kakashi located a manilla folder full of condensed quarterly reports from the hospital. With a simple fire nature jutsu, the manilla folder and the contents inside turned to a small pile of ash in Kakashi’s personal trash bin.

Feeling satisfied with his work, Kakashi sat back in his chair, lifted his hands to support the back of his head, and gently placed the heels of his feet on top of his desk. It was shaping up to be a very productive day, indeed, Kakashi thought.

It wasn’t much longer afterwards that Shikamaru abruptly appeared back in Kakashi’s office, having used the door this time. “Shizune wasn’t at the hospital this morning,” Shikamaru said. “I ran into Sakura on the way, however, and I asked her to come instead.”

Kakashi hummed. “I suppose that will do. You can begin sorting the incoming missions now, Shikamaru.” He didn’t bother to mention that he did, in fact, know that today was Shizune’s day off from duty.

Shikamaru nodded curtly before going over to the incoming mail tray and picking up an armful of mission scrolls. Just as he was about to exit through the doorway, the door swung open forcefully. Shikamaru’s eyes widened as he reeled back to make room for the woman striding into the Hokage’s office. It seemed that Sakura was in one of her more delicate moods that day, no doubt affected by the sweltering heat if her flushed skin was any indication.

“Sorry, Shikamaru,” Sakura mumbled out quickly before turning around and facing Kakashi. “You asked for me, Hokage-sama?”

Before answering, Kakashi watched bemusedly as Shikamaru shook his head and finished his exit from the office. “Ah yes, I seem to have lost the hospital’s reports from the past few quarters.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. What can I do for you?” Sakura said. She shifted her weight onto one foot and began fanning herself with one hand. As an aside, she noted, “You do realize your office is probably the hottest place in the whole village, right?”

Kakashi offered up an amicable smile. “Is it? Well, anyway, I’d really appreciate it if you could condense some of the hospital’s files that I  _ do _ have so that I can go over the new budget proposal. I figured it would be better to have someone familiar with medic shorthand to complete this task.”

“Oh?” Sakura lifted one pink eyebrow. “Okay, well where are the files? I can look over them really quick before heading back to the hospital.”

Kakashi motioned with a wide sweeping motion of his hand to the chair across from him - which, mind you, was absolutely buckling underneath the weight of the box sitting on top of it. Sakura’s jaw dropped.

“ _ Those _ are the files?” she asked. “How do you expect me to sort through all of that before my shift?”

“Oh, well I do suppose that would be a problem,” Kakashi commented, putting on his best front to appear contrite. “I guess you’ll just have to stay here until it’s finished. I’ll have someone send word to Tsunade that you won’t be in today.”

Sakura’s eyes flitted over to the floor-to-ceiling windows and back to the box of papers on the chair. “Could we open a window at least?” she asked.

“Ah, they don’t open,” Kakashi said simply.

“Sure they do,” Sakura scoffed. “They’re windows.”

“Be my guest,” Kakashi offered.

Sensing the challenge, Sakura smirked before traipsing over to the window directly behind Kakashi’s desk. Kakashi leisurely swiveled around to watch as Sakura first attempted to push the window open, her muscles straining from the effort. She then pushed even harder, biting her lip as she did so and bracing herself with one foot behind the other for leverage. After Kakashi chuckled lightly, Sakura eventually added a little bit of chakra to the natural force her muscles created only to immediately let go of the window entirely when she heard wood splintering.

“Okay, so the windows don’t open,” Sakura finally said before wiping a bit of sweat off of her brow and turning to look at her leader. “Don’t you have any AC?”

Kakashi shook his head.

“A fan?” she asked.

Another shake of his head.

Sakura paused. “An icepack?”

“Why don’t you start on the reports, Sakura?” Kakashi said pleasantly before motioning once again to the chair across from him. “I’m sure the office will cool down soon.”

Sakura huffed once more before resolutely stalking over to the chair and plopping the overstuffed box onto the floor next to it. She took her seat, perhaps a bit too theatrically, and then crossed her arms. She looked across the desk to Kakashi with a pout rivaling that of his favorite canine summons.

Kakashi grinned. “Better get to it then.”

Sakura loudly flopped open a random folder from the box and began to sift through it, but not without one final look at the man in front of her. “Yes, Hokage-sama.”

Satisfied for the moment, Kakashi continued to smile at himself as he patted the bottle of shinobi-approved, mission-grade superglue in the front pouch of his flak vest. He settled in for a very rewarding day, deciding to begin with some of his own paperwork alongside his new deskmate.

* * *

Not even two hours later, Kakashi was beginning to rethink his plan for revenge. He had originally intended for Sakura to remain in his scorching hot office for the entire workday, laboring needlessly over piles of unorganized, dreary reports. Surely, she would become so overwhelmingly bored by the end of the day that she would think twice before disrespecting her Hokage so blatantly like she had three weeks ago. As luck would have it, Kakashi’s plan was not working out. And Kakashi’s plans rarely failed.

Instead of sitting glumly at the desk, Sakura had seemed to be able to strike up a friendly conversation with nearly every shinobi, civilian, or council member who walked into Kakashi’s office that morning. It would almost be impressive, the sheer number of people with whom she seemed to have a friendly relationship, if not for the fact that Kakashi had been trying to bore her into submission.

First, it had been Shikamaru who granted Sakura some reprieve. Having run across a problem with one of the mission requests from Iwa, Shikamaru came into the office to consult with Kakashi. After he was done, Sakura had stopped him from leaving once again by asking about his new relationship with some woman named Temari. If Kakashi had bothered to listen more closely, he would have recognized the name as belonging to the older sister of the Kazekage. As it happened, Kakashi wasn’t interested enough in that moment to tune in. The conversation was short lived, and Sakura soon enough settled back into her dreary task.

Not for long, however, because soon after that, a string of people had passed through Kakashi’s office, each of which somehow managing to start a conversation with Sakura. Most notably, Genma had come knocking on Kakashi’s door to inquire about a mistake in the border guards’ patrol schedule. He had initially made some whimsical comment about Kakashi having a new secretary, which had earned him a glare from Sakura - who was holding her pen perhaps a  _ little _ too tightly for someone who  _ wasn’t _ thinking of stabbing another person. Shortly before leaving, Genma had turned serious and actually thanked Sakura for her assistance in healing one of his teammates after a mission. Surprisingly, this had turned into a long conversation about the use of senbon - both in medicine and in battle - that had prompted Genma to perch on the edge of Kakashi’s desk. At this point, Kakashi had begun to take a little more interest in his new deskmate’s conversations, as he felt personally offended by Genma’s rear making contact with his newly varnished desk.

Whilst Genma was talking with Sakura, which mostly consisted of him making appalling puns and her laughing, yet another friend of Sakura strode into Kakashi’s office. This time, it was Sarutobi Konohamaru, who had come to receive his new chunin fatigues. Genma took his leave then, having noticed that he had spent too much time there in the Hokage’s office, but was quickly replaced by Konohamaru taking interest in Sakura’s recipe for chocolate chip cookies. Apparently, Konohamaru’s mother had really taken a liking to the sweets, and was really angling for Sakura’s secret ingredient. Sakura, however, was remaining tight-lipped. Not that Kakashi was listening.

After Konohamaru left, Kakashi thought that  _ surely _ his plan would begin to take effect. It was nearing lunch time, and most of Kakashi’s subordinates were too busy on their own lunch breaks to bother the Hokage with any sort of village business. It was beginning to look that that would be the case, as another hour had passed without a single visitor. Kakashi would have been satisfied if it weren’t for the fact that Sakura was beginning to use an empty folder to fan herself. Not only did she seem unperturbed by the heat, but she was also making a surprising dent in the stack of papers which she already organized by relevance into three neat,  _ alphabetical _ piles.

Kakashi’s eyes twitched.

However, it seemed that Kami was on his side that day, as no sooner did the clock strike twelve than did a huge burst of air come rushing through the door as it slammed against the opposite wall. Not only did the onslaught of air cause a humid, sweltering front to be shoved into Sakura’s face, but it also caused all of her papers to blow across the room, no longer resembling the neat stacks they once had been. Kakashi allowed himself a soft chuckle, which was quickly met by a murderous glare from the woman across the desk. As she bent down to pick up her papers, Kakashi looked up to greet his new guest and thank them for the amusement they had caused.

Only for all of the blood to rush out of his face as he set eyes on him.

It was none other than Maito Gai, who began to stride in confidently with his hands on his green-clad hips. Behind him was the rest of his team including Tenten, Neji, and Rock Lee, though Kakashi wasn’t as concerned about their presence.

“Greetings, my eternal rival!” Gai shouted out in his usual self-assured tone. “Team Gai, reporting from Suna.”

With a slow, feline smile curling around Sakura’s lips, she turned around. She seemed uninterested in the papers which she abandoned on the floor, and instead shifted her attention to the Green Beast. She rested her chin in her hands and cheerfully observed as Gai continued with his speech.

“Kakashi-sama, I have for you our mission report, immediately upon reentering our beautiful village as always,” Gai said. His smile was so wide that all of his 32 teeth were visible - Sakura had counted. She also marveled at the fact that Gai didn’t appear to have a single sweat stain on his skin tight jumpsuit.

With his eyes and shoulders drooping, Kakashi muttered, “Thank you, just set them on the tray next to the door.”

Kakashi hadn’t even bothered to hope that Sakura wouldn’t say anything.

“Gai-sensei! It’s so nice to see you, and the rest of your team, as well,” Sakura remarked brightly. “I’m surprised you all made it back so quickly in this heat.”

Kakashi supposed her statement was innocent enough, though he decided to remain on his toes just in case. Her falsely jovial demeanor was concerning, and he suspected she was up to something.

“The heat is no match for our youthful team!” Rock Lee exclaimed with a thumbs-up. “We made it back in double speed, just to beat our last record for a return trip from Suna!”

Beside Rock Lee, Tenten and Neji had elbowed each other conspiratorially, sharing a quick smirk before looking back at Sakura.

Noticing their exchange, Sakura giggled. “Wow, I’m impressed. Usually I end up begging Naruto or Sai to carry me home from Suna, especially in the summer.”

Kakashi immediately noticed where Sakura was trying to carry the conversation, and in an effort to stop it, he had kicked Sakura’s ankle underneath the table. Sakura jumped, and locked steely eyes with Kakashi for a moment before her expression suddenly melted back into that predatory stare.

“Don’t you agree, neh, Kakashi-sama?” Sakura began. “Why, if I were on Gai’s team, I’d be  _ begging _ him for a piggyback ride!”

Oblivious to Sakura’s true meaning, Team Gai chuckled heartily before bidding farewell and stepping out of Kakashi’s office. Contrastly, Kakashi had seemed to petrify into stone.

He stared at Sakura impassively.

Sakura stared back.

He wasn’t sure for how long it had gone on until he heard a soft knock on his office door yet again. Expecting another friend of Sakura’s to join them, Kakashi harshly spat out a short  _ come in _ .

Unperturbed, Shikamaru walked in as usual, in hand a bag boasting the name of some sushi restaurant on the front. Shikamaru set the bag down on the desk before looking at both of the people sitting at the desk in turn.

“You two get in a fight or something?” he asked, though his tone was disinterested as per his typical character.

“Not at all,” Kakashi grumbled. “Thank you for lunch.”

Shikamaru waved his hand dismissively. “There’s something in there for you, too, Sakura. I had Udon go out and get it.”

Pulling away from their staring match, Sakura turned to smile warmly at her friend. “Thank you, Shikamaru! I hadn’t planned on staying here past lunch, that was very thoughtful of you.”

Shikamaru offered a short grunt in reply before making his way out the door, grateful to leave the odd pair and return to his own work.

Kakashi had already begun to reach into the takeout bag, setting one carton of food on his side of the desk and offering the other out to Sakura. Eyes narrowed, she slowly reached out to take it. When nothing jumped out to bite her, she began to open the box, a trace of a smile on her lips. Kakashi watched as the smile disappeared and she looked down at her food.

“It’s all smushed,” she said sorrowfully.

“Is it?” Kakashi mumbled around a mouthful of food. He had snuck a large bite underneath his mask as Sakura looked down at the depressing state of her own lunch.

Not sure how exactly to blame her Hokage for a flattened meal, Sakura sighed and set about breaking a set of chopsticks to dig in. The pair ate together in silence, though not entirely civilly, as the hot air was still filled with hostility between them.

The rest of the day had passed mostly in accordance with Kakashi’s plan. Although he still entertained the occasional visitor, Sakura had appeared to resign to her fate at the Hokage’s desk, not bothering much with lengthy conversation. She had even begun to sweat a little, her fan not able to do much against the direct rays from the late afternoon sun making its appearance in the office’s west-facing windows. Kakashi himself was sweating underneath all of his layers, though he managed to hide it well from the woman across from him. Sakura, on the other hand, had visible drops of sweat running down her formidable forehead.

It was nearing the end of the day when Kakashi received his final set of visitors. Sakura was just finishing writing her final summary of the hospital’s documents, and Kakashi had finally sorted through at least the most pertinent paperwork left on his desk. It was then that Shikamaru came in for the final time that day, a new stack of paperwork in his arms that he quickly deposited on the desk’s surface for tomorrow. Shikamaru was closely followed by the Hokage successor Uzumaki Naruto. Noticing her friend walking in, Sakura hurriedly rushed penning her last sentence before shoving her completed report and pen into Shikamaru’s now empty hands.

Sakura squealed as she ran over to hug Naruto, seemingly overjoyed at the prospect of leaving the Hokage tower for the day - and probably for the rest of her life if she could help it. “Naruto! Have you come to pick me up for dinner? Where’s Sai?”

Naruto chuckled as Sakura threw her arms around him. They spun around for a bit until Sakura was directly across from Kakashi’s line of sight again. She narrowed her eyes a little at him before pulling away from Naruto and smiling. It was obvious that she saw the boy as her savior, and perhaps was laying it on a bit thick. 

“Sorry, Sakura-chan, Shikamaru asked me to come. Somethin’ bout a mission?” Naruto said. He walked a couple steps away from Sakura, though he still kept his arm around her shoulder. “So, Kakashi, did you have something for me?”

“Actually, Naruto,” Shikamaru interrupted. “I just received the mission request from a messenger bird and hadn’t yet asked Hokage-sama about it. I wanted to run it by both of you before assigning it.”

“Alright then,” Kakashi said. He was a little bit forlorn about the day of recompense being cut short, but figured it had been a partial success - at best - from the start. “What do you have, Shikamaru?”

“Well, the Mizukage is asking for your presence in Kiri as soon as possible,” Shikamaru explained. “It seems that they’re having some trouble with a faction of rebels and wanted you and Naruto to help smooth things over.”

“That’s all?” Naruto laughed. “No problem, it’ll be great to see those guys again!”

Sakura rolled her eyes next to Naruto, thinking to herself that the  _ last _ time Naruto had seen any of the Kiri shinobi in person was during the Fourth Great War. Still, she couldn’t help but smile at Naruto’s exuberance.

Kakashi, on the other hand, was unimpressed. “Well, I suppose Tsunade can cover for me for a couple days. Although, I’m not sure if the council will approve of it.”

“I already talked to them,” Shikamaru said. “They thought it was a good opportunity for you to train Naruto on the more diplomatic side of things. The rebel faction itself is of relatively low skill, and peace throughout the region should make for a safe trip. The council just asked that we assign a small team to escort you both safely.”

“What about Sakura?” Naruto offered hastily. “She’s a medic, she’d be perfect!”

Sakura opened her mouth to protest, not being able to foresee herself spending an indefinite amount of time with the person who had just spent a whole day trying to sweat her out. However, she was just as quickly interrupted by a scoff from Shikamaru.

“That’s true, but you’d need at least one other person to accompany you. The council would never go for just one escort,” Shikamaru said.

Standing up from his desk, Kakashi began to voice his protest before, predictably, he was interrupted by the overly excited Naruto.

“Oh, what about Anko-sensei? It would be just like old times!” Naruto elbowed Sakura with a smile.

“Anko is away on a different mission right now,” Shikamaru mused. “Yamato is still in the village though; I’m sure he wouldn’t mind tagging along? He is part of the Hokage guard, afterall.”

“Yeah! Yamato-taichou!” Naruto shouted. “Sakura, this’ll be great! We’ll get to catch up after so long!”

“We saw each other yesterday,” Sakura said weakly, sparing a glance at the equally despondent Hokage.

“Alright, I’ll give Yamato the official mission order,” Shikamaru said on his way out. “It’ll take the council a few days to approve of the escort, but after that you all should be ready to go.”

“Thank you, Shikamaru,” Kakashi said, though his tone didn’t seem all that sincere. He grabbed the - pointless - hospital report that Shikamaru had dropped at his desk before leaving and glanced it over, not sure what else to do in the moment. He had already finished the budget proposal the day before, not that he’d let anyone know.

“C’mon, Sakura-chan!” Naruto said. “Let’s go meet Sai for dinner. He’ll be so jealous!”

Hurriedly, Naruto had dragged Sakura from the Hokage’s office. She would have liked to say that she didn’t spare a glance behind her, but nothing would have stopped her from witnessing the Hokage’s harrowing glare aimed at her back. She wasn’t sure what to expect on her newly assigned mission, but she suspected that the Hokage might attempt to take out some of his irritation on her, once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Development? Plot? What are those? This is a completely self-serving fic, and I can have as many characters alive as I want!
> 
> In all seriousness, I had originally intended for Chapter 1 to be a oneshot. But then I had too much fun and I started getting a nice response (thank you, btw) so I decided to continue it. At least for as long as I'm having fun. Please feel free to leave comments and suggestions, I really appreciate it!


	3. Misty Eyes

The journey to Kiri was shaping up to be exactly as Kakashi expected. Granted, he hadn’t predicted anything  _ specifically _ , but he definitely anticipated some level of general annoyance. It was basically his resting state at that point. They were well over the halfway point of their journey, having already taken the ferry that connected Kiri to the rest of the ninja world. Now, just a few miles from the village’s gates, Kakashi and company were waking up in their swiftly erected cabin - courtesy of Yamato.

He supposed that there were two saving graces of the entire mission. The first certainly being that he wouldn’t be forced to sleep on the wet ground, considering the fact that Yamato had no qualms about utilizing his wood-style for comfort. The second - and this is what Kakashi was most surprised to admit - being the fact that Kakashi had been aching for a reason to leave Konoha.

Kakashi would never desert his position as Hokage, and he would be even less likely to abandon Konoha altogether. It was virtually impossible. However, Kakashi’s restlessness had nothing to do at all with where his allegiances lied. Rather, they had everything to do with that exact feeling of duty. He hardly felt effectual or in any way useful when bound behind a desk. Though, he had to concede that he may very well never leave that desk again, if his only thought of escape was with the three shinobi in his present company.

They might not have been as much of a nuisance separately, their ability to irritate mitigated by the presence of other, much less eccentric soldiers. But together, it seemed that the three had formed some odd equilibrium which enhanced the sheer headache of it all. Naturally, Naruto had served the purpose of general prankster, which only brought out Yamato’s propensity to overcompensate by doting on Kakashi. And Sakura, even aside from being a general thorn in Kakashi’s side, wreaked havoc on the both of them by administering punitive blows at every opportunity. Absently, Kakashi wondered how the team had achieved such high success rates in the past - during a period of time where Anko had been on leave due to injury - but figured it had to do with brute strength rather than any semblance of tact. Yamato was definitely a capable tactician, but Kakashi presumed that when in charge of the two knuckleheads, he probably would have had his work cut out for him.

As if on cue, Naruto and Sakura had just started in on a story, reminiscing on the good days while enjoying a nice breakfast around the campfire. Since they were nearing Kiri, dry tinder was hard to come by, and Yamato had taken it upon himself to structure a rather modest fireplace in their equally modest cabin. It proved to be effective, as Sakura had managed to cook a fair share of rice over the flames, and was just starting to grill the fish that Naruto had caught earlier. 

“Remember when Anko-sensei made us hang upside-down from a tree branch for an entire day?” Naruto said as he handed a newly gutted fish over to Sakura. “Using  _ only _ chakra?”

Sakura snorted before putting the fish on the grill. “That was nothing compared to what she usually did. Remember when Yamato-taichou threatened to turn us  _ into  _ trees?”

Naruto burst into laughter then, joyfully slamming the man in question on his back as he had been passing a bowl of rice over to Kakashi. Startled, Yamato had lost his grip on the slick bowl, promptly flinging it right into Kakashi’s lap.

Ignorant to the chaos he had just triggered, Naruto continued, “Do you remember Sai’s face? I think that was the first time he ever showed any real emotion!”

Kakashi looked down at his lap blank faced, seemingly disinterested as he regarded the many grains of rice that were making themselves at home in his pants. Mortified, Yamato quickly shuffled over and began to swipe the rice off of Kakashi with his bare hands.

“Hokage-sama! I’m so sorry,” Yamato stuttered. “I’ll clean it up for you, right away!”

“Tenzo,” Kakashi said in as even a tone as he could muster. “Would you please remove your hands from my crotch?”

Properly abashed, Yamato immediately retracted his hands. Ignoring a snort from Sakura, Kakashi continued to remove the remaining rice on his own before reaching his hand out for a new bowl. He was just about to dig in, figuring the rest of his company was sufficiently distracted by Yamato’s embarrassment to ignore when he pulled his mask down. Unfortunately, he was interrupted by yet another smart remark from Sakura.

“Don’t take it personally, Yamato-taichou,” Sakura said with mock concern. “For some reason, Hokage-sama doesn’t really like people messing with his pants.”

Kakashi fit her with as menacing of a glare as he was capable of and tried not to remember the image of Sakura pulling down his pants whilst he laid on his desk several weeks ago, but both attempts were in vain. Not only was Kakashi presented with that incredibly undignified mental image, but that wretched smirk never left Sakura’s face. In fact, it even grew with Naruto’s next remark.

“No kidding!” Naruto guffawed. “You’d think he would, since he carries around Pervy Sage’s books everywhere.”

The man had definitely taken Sakura’s words to have a different meaning, but it was still compelling enough to bring him to tearful laughter. Naruto fell onto his back, childishly rolling around as he continued to laugh. Kakashi had formally met Naruto perhaps two years ago before beginning his training to become Hokage in the future, but even before that Kakashi had known him as a bullheaded yet brilliant ninja and the hero of Konoha. Naruto had accomplished many feats throughout his short life, and beyond a doubt deserved the title of Nanadaime. And yet, the boy still had an astonishing ability to turn off all of that prowess and revert back to an irritating prankster. Especially, it seemed, when it came to pranking Kakashi.

Kakashi resolved to attempt to ignore his comrades for the remainder of breakfast, figuring that they would soon be leaving to finish the journey to Kiri anyway. He turned away from the rest of his group to finish his rice in peace, patiently waiting for Sakura to finish cooking the fish while tactfully manipulating his mask as needed when he went for another bite. Eventually, Naruto’s giggles had subsided, and he went back to chatting with Sakura and Yamato about previous missions. Feeling as if taking the high road had paid off, Kakashi allowed himself to relax and enjoy the dull murmur of chatter in the background. Kakashi did truly love  _ all _ of his precious people, and that included the people sitting around the fire in that cabin. Still, he did sometimes find it easier not to engage with them directly.

Soon, a tap came on Kakashi’s shoulder. He turned around only to be met face to face with the dismembered head of one of the fish Sakura had been cooking. Curiously, Kakashi raised an eyebrow and fixed his gaze beyond the gaping fish to Naruto, who was grinning ear to ear - every bit resembling the fox spirit inside of him.

“Yes, Naruto?” Kakashi said, his exasperated expression hidden behind his mask.

“It’s like looking in a mirror, isn’t it, Kaka-sama?” Naruto snickered. “Sakura and I have bets on what’s behind your mask. My guess is giant fish lips!”

Sakura came then, pushing Naruto aside and walking towards Kakashi with a plate in her hand. She was smiling sweetly, and yet Kakashi could still see the mirth in her eyes. “Oh, give it up Naruto,” she said as she extended the plate towards Kakashi. “We all know he has giant buck teeth.”

Kakashi only sighed. He was used to people speculating as to why he wore a mask, and even more used to the antics of Sakura and Naruto at this point. Silently, he held out his hand to receive the plate Sakura was offering to him. He began to cut into the fish automatically, until he noticed that for some reason his utensils wouldn’t pierce the meat.

“Sakura?” Kakashi called.

“Hm?” Sakura turned her body around, though her eyes were still on the fire she had returned to in order to cook for everyone else. “Something wrong, Kakashi-sama?”

Kakashi gave her one of his cheeriest smiles. “I think you burned the fish.”

Now intrigued, Sakura fully turned around as she held out the plate she had prepared for Yamato. She glanced down at Kakashi’s plate as he tilted it towards her. In the middle of the plate was a shrivelled black mass, resembling no part of the filet it had once been. Kakashi kept a pleasant look on his face, wishing to make Sakura feel appropriately apologetic for having attempted to poison her Hokage.

“I suppose it is,” she admitted before turning away again. “Guess maybe you boys should have cooked for yourselves. We can keep that in mind on the journey back.”

Naruto giggled before whispering conspiratorially to Kakashi. “I learned a long time ago not to complain about Sakura’s cooking.”

Yamato chimed it. “Here, you can have some of mine, Hokage-sama.”

“That’s so nice of you, Yamato-taichou!” Sakura mocked before sitting down and starting in on her own plate of food. “Maybe you can even give Kakashi-sama a piggyback ride to Kiri once we head out, I’m sure he’d appreciate that.”

Kakashi and Sakura immediately locked eyes once she finished speaking, and remained in a staring contest like that for the remainder of breakfast. Neither of them forfeited.

***

It was a relief, Kakashi thought, to be in the presence of unfamiliar shinobi as he and his team made their way to the Mizukage’s compound. Even though the mist was seeping into his clothes and adhering the damp fabric to his skin - including his face as he kept the mask on - he was able to enjoy some relative quiet. And, even, a little bit of satisfaction.

The only member of their escort who Kakashi was familiar with was the Mizukage’s right hand, Ao. Kakashi respected Ao as a talented shinobi, and yet he was beginning to respect him even more as a potential source of irritation for Sakura. It was about time that someone managed to ruffle her feathers as she had done to Kakashi.

Ao was rather traditional, reflecting the more clandestine and hostile attitude most ninja had adopted prior to the Third Great War. He by no means underestimated his fellow shinobi, but he still wasn’t shy in voicing his doubts about their personalities. This propensity of his grated on Sakura, who Ao had seemed to pick as a target for his disapproval. Ao wouldn’t dare criticize Naruto, who had effectively saved the entire world during the Fourth Great War, despite his age. Yamato had also seemed to have earned the Kiri nin’s respect, having been a well-known Anbu member in the past. Sakura, on the other hand, while she had played a major role in the war, she had never directly displayed these abilities to Ao. As a result, he seemed to be rather doubtful of Kakashi’s decision to have her as his guard.

Kakashi knew that despite all of Sakura’s annoying habits - namely teasing him - she was an incredibly powerful woman. She had adopted Tsunade’s robust fighting style, even making improvements to it with the development of her own jutsu. She was also an especially competent medic. Kakashi was confident that Sakura could heal nearly any injury and still have chakra left over to punish the person with her fists for even getting injured in the first place.

Unfortunately, Ao was not privy to this kind of understanding of her skill.

“So young,” he mused aloud. “And exceptionally bold for a  _ medic. _ I wonder why one of the Sannin chose for you to surpass her?”

Kakashi thought that Sakura was perhaps just as bold as Tsunade. Though, apparently in Ao’s perception Sakura hadn’t earned an exception for her behavior as Tsunade had, perhaps due to a lack of experience.

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll find out,” Sakura chirped, though in her demeanor and clenched fists, the threat in her words was clear.

“Sakura is a profoundly adept shinobi,” Kakashi said. “I’d trust her with my life.”

Sakura looked at him with her eyes wide, her fists relaxing by her sides. Kakashi decided to ignore her in favor of observing how Ao coughed indignantly and the other members of the escort covered their grins. While it was admittedly rather enjoyable to see Sakura flustered for once, Kakashi wouldn’t stand for any criticism of his own shinobi. Ao had simply gone too far in voicing his disapproval, and Kakashi had no choice but to put a stop to it.

The group fell into a somewhat awkward silence then, which was only mollified by Naruto’s continued chatter as he caught up with some of the Kiri nin who were part of his escort. He asked for updates on some of his old friends and even offered a few updates of his own. Naruto’s affable demeanor was infectious, and he quickly engaged all of his new friends in a discussion about the wonders of ramen for the remainder of their walk to the Mizukage’s compound. Yamato was quickly pulled in to affirm the culinary prowess of Ichiraku.

Uninterested in Naruto’s conversation, Sakura sighed to herself as she plucked her wet cloak away from her body. “This damn mist has added about ten pounds to my coat.”

Kakashi hummed from beside her. He, too, was appropriately soggy from head to toe, though he had to wear the white Hokage robes rather than an ordinary traveling cloak. However, he didn’t outwardly display his discomfort in any way.

“I suppose you should have packed a different one, then,” Kakashi said without looking at her. From the corner of his eye, he could see her mouthing his words back to him with her tongue out and eyebrows screwed together. She likely knew he could see and wanted him to be aware of her irritation. Kakashi chuckled to himself.

Sakura huffed, then, lifting her nose up in the air along with her palm. With a quick glance in Kakashi’s direction, she gathered some chakra in her hand and forcibly pushed it out in a thin layer. She could only do this in small bursts, but with her chakra control she was able to repeat the action in quick succession, effectively creating a little umbrella over her head and shielding it from the drizzling mist. Kakashi rolled his eyes.

Soon, their group reached the Mizukage’s compound and was quickly sheltered from the rain by its thick, stone walls. Kakashi and the rest of his team visibly relaxed, eager to be dry once again. Their escorts hurried ahead, though the Konoha nin lagged behind in order to prolong their enjoyment of the dry air. Their footsteps echoed throughout the halls, likely alerting Mei and her counsel to their arrival.

Kakashi really liked Mei. She was incredibly civil and one of the more agreeable and candid kages. Kakashi tended to agree with her on a lot of policies and decisions throughout their professional correspondence, and he really admired and respected the strides she had made in erasing Kirigakure’s reputation as the Bloody Mist. Though, like every ninja she tended to have her eccentricities, particularly her tendency to pry into his virtually nonexistent love life.

Kakashi and the rest of his team strolled into the Mizukage’s office then, eager to reunite with Mei and the rest of her counsel and to formally receive their assignments for the duration of their mission. They were greeted by Mei herself, who was smiling joyfully from behind her desk and quickly stood up to meet them near the door. Chojuro was also there beside her, leaning over some sort of document over the desk before he straightened and joined Mei in welcoming the Konoha nin. Chojuro had been a rather anxious person in the past, though it appeared that his experience in the war had emboldened him as he approached his old comrades without hesitation.

“Hokage-sama,” Mei remarked. “It’s so nice to see you again, along with your lovely team.”

As Kakashi moved to accept the handshake that Mei was offering to him, Yamato and Sakura bowed respectfully on either side of him. Naruto, on the other hand, was not yet used to the decorum that most diplomats held and was splaying his arms wide to envelop both Mei and Chojuro in a bear hug. Luckily, Yamato was able to capture the back of his shirt collar in time to pull Naruto back before he could fully grab his companions. Mei giggled brightly to herself, seemingly enjoying Naruto’s vigor, as Chojuro scratched the back of his head and grimaced.

“It’s a pleasure to speak again with you, as well, Naruto,” Mei said. “I believe the last time we had the opportunity was at the end of the war.”

Naruto, having caught on to the fact that it wouldn’t exactly be appropriate to give the Mizukage a bear hug in front of her guards, put his hands on his hips. Well, as well as he could with Sakura and Yamato’s death grips on his arms. He laughed sheepishly to himself before replying, “We definitely have some catchin’ up to do. And you, too, Chojuro.”

“Oh!” The Mizukage exclaimed with widened eyes. “Pardon me, I forgot to introduce Chojuro. Konoha representatives and Hokage-sama, this is Chojuro. I’m training him to take my place after I retire.”

Chojuro smiled modestly by Mei’s side, bowing in turn to each Yamato, Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi. Kakashi noticed that a slight dusting of pink appeared on the tops of Chojuro’s cheeks when he made eye contact with Sakura, but not with anyone else. It was amusing to see someone’s emotions so blatantly displayed on their face, especially from a trained shinobi. Apparently, Chojuro’s newfound confidence did not extend to any romantic pursuits.

“Well, I suppose you’re all probably wondering what your exact assignment is,” Mei said once all introductions were made. “We can catch up later. Let’s sit down and go over the specifics, shall we?”

All of the Konoha nin nodded their heads in agreement, dutifully following the Mizukage back over to her desk where several chairs had been arranged by some of Mei’s assistants. The escorts that had led Kakashi and the rest of his team to the Mizukage compound left then, including Ao, leaving only Mei and Chojuro. A more somber expression overtook Mei’s face then.

“I appreciate you all coming, especially you Hokage-sama,” Mei began. “I’m sure you must be very busy in your home village, but as you know we have somewhat of a situation here.”

“We’re more than happy to help, Mei,” Kakashi offered.

Mei smiled warmly. “That’s good to hear. Well, you already know that a rebel faction has sprung forth. They are particularly adverse to our village’s alliance with the rest of the great nations, including Konoha. I figured that having some of our allies over might show the leader of the rebels not to fear such a positive change, and I was hoping you might agree.”

Kakashi hummed, glancing over at the rest of his team. “And what demands are they making?” he asked. It wasn’t likely that the rebels would be silent, if the Mizukage was asking for outside help, and Kakashi was wondering if it would be worth the risk to his team to stay and lend their assistance.

“That’s where it gets a bit more complicated,” Mei said. “We’ve noticed their presence based on a few smaller scale instances of vandalism and even violence, but no one has come forth to make any demands. I was hoping that you and your team might draw them out, and that your peaceful presence in the village might put the rest of my people at ease.”

Kakashi nodded. “We’re at your disposal, then. Let us know what we can do.”

“You can count on us!” Naruto proclaimed with one of his toothiest grins. 

Both Mei and Chojuro returned the smiles.

“I’m so glad to hear that,” Mei said. “Konoha is especially good for their infectious charm, which is precisely why I called upon you.”

Kakashi wasn’t really sure about  _ charm _ , per se, but he would concede that Naruto at the very least had a remarkable ability to influence people to see the silver lining of most things. He also presumed that Mei had called upon the Hokage in particular in case the rebels began to make any demands that affected the treaty signed between the two villages.

Chojuro started in, then, on assigning the different roles that each of them would have. “Right well, once we learned who would be accompanying you, Hokage-sama, we made some preliminary objectives for each of you. Hokage-sama, you will mostly stay here with Mei-sama to go over a plan to confront the rebel force.”

“What about me?” Naruto asked, impatient as ever.

“Ah, yes, Naruto,” Chojuro said. “You and Yamato will be alternating between visiting the academy and the commercial sector. Your goal is just to make your presence known and make friends with the villagers as best you can.”

Naruto slapped his hand onto Yamato’s back, making some comment or the other about how he could never get rid of his old captain, even as Chojuro continued on with Sakura’s assignment.

“And Sakura,” Chojuro said with yet another blush. “Your, er, exceptional talent as a medic is in great need at the hospital. If you could please, um, help with some of their research, our hospital director will meet you there tomorrow.”

“Of course,” Sakura said. She tried to smile back at the swordsman, but having noticed his discomfort, only one corner of her mouth would raise.

“Right!” Mei said with a clap of her hands. “If that’s all settled, I’ll have someone show you all to your rooms for the next few days. Go relax, and then we can catch up over lunch!”

They all rose from their seats, moving towards the door in a unified group before Mei signaled outside of the door for two of her guards to appear. She instructed them to guide the Konoha nin to their rooms. A guard motioned for Naruto and Yamato to follow him down one hallway where they would be staying in adjoining rooms, since they would be doing mostly the same activities together each day. Another guard appeared, this one with a particularly sour face, though it couldn’t possibly rival Ao’s. He waved for Kakashi and Sakura to follow him down a separate hallway. Once they were separated from the rest of the group, Kakashi glanced down to catch Sakura’s eye. If her narrowed eyes and grumpy expression were anything to go by, Kakashi figured they were both equally as miffed about lodging near each other for their stay in Kiri.

Despite their displeasure, Kakashi and Sakura remained in silence for their short walk down one of the hallways in the Mizukage’s compound. Their guide didn’t particularly seem to mind either, as he was grumbling to himself anyway about something that seemed to have happened earlier that morning. Soon enough, Kakashi and Sakura arrived at two doors, which their guide motioned at briefly before brushing past them and making his way back down the hallway. Kakashi and Sakura both raised an eyebrow at each other, seemingly thinking the same thing about the other man’s hasty departure.

Kakashi began to head into one of the doors then, assuming that Sakura would have no qualms about parting wordlessly. However, as he attempted to close the door behind him, it caught on the edge of Sakura’s boot. Kakashi turned around once he was halfway within his room - a modest guest space with only the essential furnishings - and appraised the woman as she stood in his doorway.

“Yes, Sakura?” Kakashi said expectantly.

“I have to check your room,” Sakura explained as she bit the inside of her cheek. “It’s my job,  _ Hokage-sama _ .”

Kakashi sighed before flopping down on the edge of his bed. Really, there was nothing he could argue with; he simply waved his arm to motion to the rest of the room. “Have at it.”

Sakura rolled her eyes, but complied by beginning to make her rounds throughout the room. Not only did she check high and low for any traps or hidden seals, but she also performed a few seals of her own to erect chakra barriers around the space that would deter any intruders. Kakashi watched her perform her duty for a moment, before deciding that he might as well confront her about her more  _ annoying _ habits. If Tsunade was any example to go by, Kakashi figured that a more direct approach would be the best method by which to finally put an end to her pestering him. If nothing else, passive aggression was getting him nowhere.

“I suppose I should have guessed that you wouldn’t be giving me a break any time soon,” Kakashi said.

Sakura turned around from her position over by his restroom, her lips pursed together as if she was trying to contain an onslaught of insults. “What is that supposed to mean?” she finally replied.

“Well you’ve only been badgering me since you healed me in my office a few weeks ago,” Kakashi said. “Even more so since the beginning of this mission.”

Having finished securing Kakashi’s bedroom, Sakura strode over to him with her arms crossed. “Badgering you, Kakashi-sama? I’m just treating you like anybody else. You badgered  _ me _ when you held me hostage in your office during that  _ awful _ heatwave!”

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. “Hostage?”

“Oh, don’t pretend you didn’t already have the hospital’s reports,” Sakura scoffed. “Shikamaru told me about how you had approved the new budget  _ days _ before you called me into your office that day.”

Kakashi made a mental note to question Shikamaru once he returned back to Konoha. “You agreed to write up the summary,” he pointed out.

“It was the least I could do,” Sakura said. “I figured you were embarrassed.”

“Oh?” Kakashi chuckled. “About what?”

“About telling me how Gai had to carry you,” Sakura said. She rolled her eyes one final time before releasing her crossed arms and taking one more step closer to Kakashi where he sat perched on the bed. “ _ And _ from when I put my hand down your pants.”

Kakashi was just about to retort when he heard a sharp gasp from the entrance to the room. He whipped his head around to see who it was, and was greeted by none other than Mei, who had a delicate hand placed over her mouth.

“Oh my,” she whispered. “So sorry to intrude.” She hastily turned away, far too quick for Kakashi to form his words into any sort of explanation.

Kakashi slowly turned his head to fix Sakura with a glare. It wasn’t really her fault that Mei had come to check on them both, and it wasn’t even her fault that Mei had only appeared towards the end of their conversation. Still, that delighted look on Sakura’s face needed to be expelled  _ somehow _ .

“Huh,” Sakura snorted. “Looks like she won’t be asking you about your marital status any time soon. You’re welcome!”

Sakura patted a consoling hand on Kakashi’s shoulder, allowing him a quick look of pity and a nod before she spun around on her toes and out the door. With the click of the door closing behind her, Kakashi fell onto his back and groaned.

He would never catch a break, afterall, it seemed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update! This chapter was kinda hard to get out, and I still don't really like it. I'm thinking of starting a weekly update schedule and posting every Friday/Saturday? It's been a nice way to relax with school and everything.
> 
> Anyway, please leave comments if you feel so inclined! I always appreciate them. I'm also going to start replying to them (I think I was a little shy before).
> 
> Take care, everyone.


	4. Will Be Mist

Kakashi hardly ever found himself begrudging the times where he could simply sit back and observe. Whether he was lounging in a tree branch reading his favorite book and looking out on the village or if he was studying an opponent from across the battlefield, Kakashi felt most comfortable when he was a passive observer. It allowed for him to plan, adjust, and adapt to whatever situation was at hand, and even provided for some humor in certain cases. As the leader of his village, Kakashi had many precious people, and he often found that simply observing was the best way for him to protect them.

_ That _ , and sometimes people watching allowed him to relax after a long day of hiding from his advisors.

However, he wasn’t surprised to find that his little hobby of observing extended to when he was outside of the village, as well. Kakashi had just finished a busy morning of negotiating with Mei and detailing out some of the finer details of their treaty whilst also considering what things they may change once the rebel faction started making demands. It had taken them several, concentrated hours of work. They had been so focused that Mei hadn’t even noticed Chojuro’s absence. Furthermore, neither of them had noticed when each member of Kakashi’s team had notified them of their departure to other parts of the village. It was well past lunch time when Mei apologized for keeping Kakashi so long and suggested that he find some of his other teammates and enjoy a little bit of time throughout the more entertaining parts of Kiri. Kakashi gratefully agreed, and was soon escorted by a nameless Kiri nin to none other than Kiri’s genin academy.

It was admittedly a little bit surprising to find one of the most stoic Anbu operatives along with Konoha’s hero playing around with a bunch of 9-year-olds. However, if nothing else it was extremely amusing. Yamato had been roped into building small play houses throughout the playground. Apparently, some of the childrens’ parents knew Yamato to be the wood-style ninja, having inherited the unique kekkei-genkai of the Shodaime. Yamato, a typically nondescript shinobi, had sheepishly accepted their admiration, which quickly led to some of the children making requests on what to include in their new playhouses. This one wanted a full kitchen set, this one wanted an ironing board, and some little girl over there wanted a kunai training dummy. To each their own, Kakashi supposed.

Naruto was proving to be just as popular as Yamato, and had easily reverted back to his own genin days to challenge some of the academy’s braver students to duels in taijutsu. All bets were off, it seemed, as Naruto was currently facing about ten different students at once - no Kage Bunshin to be seen - and hair pulling and face slapping evidently was  _ not _ off limits. Naruto was holding back, of course. Kakashi absently wondered when the red marks on Naruto’s face might finally disappear.  _ Oof _ , or the bite marks everywhere else.

Unbidden, Kakashi thought to himself that if Sakura were here, she would have promptly erased some of Naruto’s wounds before adding a few more of her own. That would have made the picture complete.

Kakashi shook his head to clear his thoughts so that he could reply to one of the pleasantries from the few shinobi parents that had gravitated towards him. It appeared that they were pretty enthusiastic about having Konoha representatives in Kiri, and that they considered it a special honor to have the Hokage himself grace them with their presence. The dynamic allowed for a lot of flattery, but also for some more serious questions. Such as, what did Hokage-sama think about having the chunin exams at Kiri next year? What did he think about the children who would become next year’s genin? Did he have any advice on how to get rid of grass stains? He had to admit he wasn’t exactly expecting the last one, but people tended to look for consultation from the strangest sources, especially if they gave off any semblance of authority. Kakashi tried his best to respond to each question, but the entire time his eyes were focused on his teammates, and even the perimeter to scan for any threats.

It was a particularly jovial scene, but a shinobi could never be too careful in a foreign land. Especially not a foreign land which they happened to be allied with, where a new rebel faction was springing forth. It would be absolutely foolish not to expect some sort of danger. Kakashi knew that Mei had arranged for several guards to discreetly detail Kakashi and his teammates around the village, but the Copy Ninja never felt safer than when he had his own back.

After a while, Kakashi had decided to lay down on one of the benches surrounding the playground. The majority of the genin’s parents had left by then, promises of a hot dinner around the family table luring their respective children to part with their new friends. Only the loneliest and most audacious children remained to bother Yamato and Naruto, who had now joined forces. The pair of Konoha nin - who, mind you, spent most of their time in trees - were challenging the little kids to a tree climbing contest sans chakra. Some of the more advanced children cheated, of course, enhancing their climbing abilities with a little bit of chakra flowing in their hands and feet. Naruto and Yamato pretended not to notice from the top branch, goading the children on with shouts of encouragement and even some taunts.

At that moment, one of the more advanced academy students had fallen from the highest point on the tree that any of her peers had gotten to yet. The tree that Yamato had constructed was particularly tall, taller even than the academy, and the student had fallen with a harsh  _ thump _ and an even sharper hiss of pain as all of the air was knocked out of her lungs. No sooner did tears begin to well up in her eyes than did a booming voice reach out to them from the back steps of the academy. Quickly, the voice approached even closer as its owner sped down the rock path leading to the playground.

“ _ Uzumaki Naruto! _ ” the voice shouted. “You better not be encouraging Kiri  _ academy _ students to be falling to their deaths! That can be considered an act of war!”

Having heard the absolute venom in the tone of the approaching woman, the remaining genin students had hopped down from the tree immediately. They stood next to their fallen friend, appropriately abashed faces pointed down at the dirt which they were kicking lightly with their feet. 

“You’re  _ helping  _ him, Yamato-taichou?” the voice continued to screech.

Naruto and Yamato simultaneously gulped from their perch in the tree, a quick glance between them confirming that neither knew what to do. Jump from the tree and face the kunoichi’s wrath, or stay up on their branch and risk being whisked to the ground with one well-placed kick to the trunk?

With a short chuckle at the look of pure terror on his teammates’ faces, Kakashi craned his neck to tilt his head behind him and regarded the woman who was currently storming across the playground. Sakura had her hands curled into fists and her eyebrows so scrunched together they almost met at the wrinkle in the middle of her nose. Kakashi half expected for steam to be radiating off of her as her ire heated the mist all around them. At the very least, her heavy footfalls were leaving deep imprints in the muddy earth beneath her. 

Chojuro was following closely after her, almost scrambling to keep up with Sakura’s rage induced-pace. The young man kept having to readjust his glasses, pushing them up on his nose further and more aggressively each time in the hopes that they would stay in place. His frames really had no chance, as his hurried pace kept jostling them back down the bridge of his nose.

Before long, Sakura had arrived at the base of the tree, and had begun shaking it forcefully to knock her teammates off balance. Chojuro was right beside her, all of his attempts to placate the kunoichi falling upon deaf ears. The children looked up at Sakura in both awe and terror, their eyes wide and mouths gaping as she finally managed to dislodge both Yamato and Naruto from the tree. They fell like bricks from their branch, landing far less gracefully and from a much greater height than the child who had fallen previously. Seeing that her punishment was successful, if Yamato and Naruto’s groans of pain were any indication, Sakura dusted off her hands on her apron and turned around to survey the children crowded behind her.

The switch that flipped then was astonishing. Sakura had gone from the stone-eyed avenger to a kind, nurturing  _ role model _ as soon as she turned to face the students that were looking up at her.

“Now, who was the sweet little girl that fell down earlier?” Sakura asked warmly, a smile smoothing some of her harsher features. The rest of the children reflected her smile.

“Me,” the girl said, warily raising a hand to about shoulder-level before hastily putting it down. Kakashi admired her suspicion as a shinobi in trainign, although even she was not immune to Sakura’s full attention. 

Sakura got down onto her knees and held out her hand to the girl. She gently began examining her arms, legs, and head for any wounds. “You aren’t hurt, are you?”

The girl quickly shook her head. All tenseless in her limbs that had arrived upon first interacting with a stranger swiftly dissipated at Sakura’s motherly tone. “No,” she said. “My back stings a little.”

“Ah,” Sakura said with a knowing nod. “I’ll make sure to help you with that. What did you say your name was?”

“Anzu,” the girl said. She smiled brightly at Sakura.

“Anzu-chan,” Sakura said. “Would you mind turning around for me?”

Everyone gathered around as Sakura set to work. She gently pushed the hem of Anzu’s shirt up her back, careful to only expose as much skin as was necessary to heal the injury. This amounted to a small strip on the girl’s back where there was a small scrape that had only barely begun to collect blood. Sakura let out an empathetic hiss of pain once she saw it, gently patting Anzu’s shoulder to comfort her. She then placed a well-practiced hand over the scrape, emitting a small amount of healing chakra to the area as she murmured words of reassurance to the girl.

“How did you get this?” Sakura asked, intending to distract Anzu from the healing process.

“Must’ve cut it on the bark coming down,” Anzu murmured languidly.

It seemed that everyone was in awe of Sakura’s demeanor at that moment. She so skillfully soothed the child that Anzu had begun to close her eyes sleepily. A comforting atmosphere had fallen across the entire yard, drawing in not only the genin students but also Chojuro, Naruto, and Yamato. Chojuro was looking at Sakura almost with reverence, his arms falling loosely at his sides and jaw gaping open - a near replica of the three other children next to him. Even Naruto and Yamato had gotten closer, no longer afraid of their teammate and instead inching forward to watch as she mesmerized each of the children. Even Kakashi had gotten up from his lounging position to stand next to the bench he had previously been laying on. It was a wonder that Sakura could flip dispositions so quickly, and he had a feeling he wouldn’t want to miss it. Even if it meant he could compare her current demeanor to a less pleasant one later on.

Soon enough - because really, Anzu’s wound hardly warranted medical ninjutsu to begin with - Sakura had finished the procedure. She pulled Anzu’s shirt back into place with a flourish and patted her on the back to indicate that it was over. Anzu wheeled around gratefully, gushing words of thanks before Sakura could wave them away casually. The other children began to crowd her then, rushing forward with their own small cuts and bruises and asking her to heal them. Sakura cheerfully obliged, even handing out hugs and pats on the head like other medics might hand out bandages. Before long, she ushered all of the children away, urging them to walk home in pairs so that their parents wouldn’t miss them.

As Sakura straightened and got to her feet, Chojuro remarked from beside her, “Well, if anyone were skeptical of Konoha’s involvement with our village, they won’t be once those children spread the news of the fairy with pink hair that can heal anybody.”

“Oh come on,” Sakura said with a blush growing on her face. “He only called me a fairy to make me laugh!”

“Sakura a fairy?” Naruto chuckled. “That kid would be so disappointed to see what you  _ usually _ act like.”

“Naruto,” Yamato cautioned with a hand on his back and a sheepish smile. “Let’s not forget Sakura’s original intentions when she found us.”

Naruto paled as Sakura finally directed her attention towards him. The fury bubbled up within her once again, turning her hands into fists and smile into a grimace.

“Which reminds me,” Sakura said from between her teeth. “Naruto,  _ why _ exactly were you encouraging untrained  _ children _ to climb a tree that tall with no support or safety measures?”

“Uh, well, I-” Naruto stammered.

“And Yamato-taichou,” she snapped before Naruto had a chance to explain himself. “Why did you erect the tree in the first place?”

Yamato casually scratched the back of his head as he leaned against the tree in question, a well-placed palm triggering a jutsu that caused the tree to quickly shrink back down into the earth as if it had never been there in the first place. Sakura didn’t humor him, instead spinning on her feet to finally address Kakashi, who until that point had only been a silent observer.

“And  _ you _ ,” she said, an obvious distaste on her tongue. “ _ You _ just sat there and watched!”

Kakashi let one low cough escape his lips and lowered his eyes in response. He wondered if it was possible for a person’s eyes to turn red once they reached a level of anger high enough. He didn’t want to watch to find out.

Chojuro hesitantly reached out a hand to place on Sakura’s shoulder before swiftly retracting it once Sakura whipped around, her glare now directed at him. Her eyes softened a bit, but not before Chojuro blushed and cleared his throat uncomfortably.

“Erm, well, I just thought I’d mention why we came here in the first place,” Chojuro said, never making direct eye contact with the kunoichi in front of him.

“Oh,” Sakura said simply. All evidence of anger swiftly evaporated from her face as she oriented herself back around to look at her teammates, apparently remembering something. “I just finished my work at the hospital and Chojuro came to inform me that Mizukage-sama finally received correspondence from the rebel faction. She wants all of us back at the compound as soon as possible.”

Naruto sighed with relief, all apparent conflict being forgotten for a later date. “Well why didn’t you just say so? Let’s get goin’!”

Everyone wordlessly agreed, falling into step behind Chojuro who took it upon himself to escort them back to the Mizukage’s compound. The walk was relatively short, but with the heavy mist and labyrinthine roadways in Kiri, the Konoha nin were thankful for his guidance. Upon reaching the main square of the village, the group had fallen into a rather comfortable position. Chojuro, Yamato, and Naruto walked on ahead, chattering about the course of their days and making lighthearted jokes. Kakashi and Sakura took up the rear, walking side by side wordlessly. It would almost be peaceful, if Kakashi didn’t know any better based on his previous one-on-one interactions with Sakura.

“Can’t you walk any faster?” Sakura broke the silence with a groan. “You’re supposed to be the strongest shinobi in our village.”

Kakashi imperceptibly lowered his speed. “Is that so?”

“ _ Yes _ ,” she huffed. “And what’s worse is that  _ someone _ has to stay behind to protect you and that has to be me!”

“Am I slowing you down?” Kakashi asked with mock concern. “Oh, please, don’t let me hold you up.”

A green glower met charcoal eyes creased with a smile.

“You’re insufferable,” she said. “You  _ know _ I can’t leave you unattended, because if you even got a scratch they’d confiscate my headband!”

“You could just heal it,” Kakashi offered. “No one would ever know.”

Sakura groaned even louder the second time, turning her head up to the sky and shaking it back and forth as she ran her hands down her face. Remarkably, she still didn’t slip on the slick cobblestone of the path before them and expertly avoided the paths of other civilians who were walking in the opposite direction. Mist had begun to pool on her face before she finally lowered her chin back down and looked at Kakashi again with a suffering look on her face.

“Please don’t mention healing again,” she pleaded. “People were asking me for free medical advice  _ all day _ . Do you have any idea how common warts are in Kiri? And  _ athlete’s foot _ ?”

Kakashi chucked, not so fondly remembering how the parents had shamelessly asked him for free advice at the academy earlier in the day. “That sounds like a difficult day.”

“And  _ you _ aren’t making it any easier by being a slowpoke,” she said, emphasized by a poke on his arm.

Kakashi rolled his eyes. “Then why don’t you ask Yamato to switch places with you? I’m sure he’d be more than happy to.”

Sakura looked back ahead of them to where the three other men were gathered just a short distance away. They were separated by only a few civilians clustered between them, but the overall commotion within Kiri’s square drowned out any words that could be heard from their conversation. 

“And walk with Chojuro?” Sakura said. “He’s a nice guy, but I’ve spent all day with him and I think I deserve a break.”

“Ah.” Kakashi nodded wisely. “He keeps trying to ask you out, doesn’t he?”

“You noticed it too?” Sakura gasped. “I thought it was just a little crush but I really think he might have feelings for me!”

Kakashi laughed inwardly, finding amusement in the fact that Sakura was so scandalized at the thought of someone having actual feelings for her. As bothersome as she could be, even Kakashi had to admit that she was a good-looking woman. And even more importantly, she was talented and well-accomplished. He was surprised that more people weren’t requesting to court her.

“Why don’t you tell him that you had your hands in the Hokage’s pants?” Kakashi suggested. “That seems to discourage other Kiri nin, in my experience.”

Sakura’s jaw dropped, her arm flinching with suspected intent to punch him, but she seemed to have second-guessed herself as her arm fell back to her side. Punching the Hokage certainly wouldn’t make her look good on a mission report.

“You  _ impossible _ -” Sakura said, although she didn’t get to finish the thought. Her eyes had flickered over to something over Kakashi’s shoulder, and quickly came to focus in a look of determination. No sooner had she begun her insult towards Kakashi than did she leap across the cobblestone road, arms stretched out and fists poised for attack. Kakashi followed her with his eyes and watched as she tackled a Kiri civilian to the ground. Her fists were tangled in the front of his shirt, and she was bringing his face up to meet hers before hastily shoving him to the ground again and searching for  _ something _ in his pockets.

“Sakura!” Naruto shouted. He, Yamato, and Chojuro had quickly caught on to the fact that something was happening and were rushing back towards Sakura at full speed. They had to shove other civilians out of their way, the people who had just been making their way home from work compelled to stillness and silence as they watched a Konoha shinobi accost one of their own.

“Neutralize this!” Sakura shouted as her hands finally enclosed around what she had been looking for. She flung the object behind her, uncaring towards who caught it as she continued to restrain the man who was groaning in pain beneath her.

Kakashi quickly recognized the object as a paper bomb, and watched with interest as Yamato caught it from the air. The bomb had just begun to let out a low sizzle, the edges bursting into small flames before Yamato quickly composed a seal and neutralized the bomb. He rolled it up and placed it in his vest pouch before looking up at Kakashi, astonishment on his face.

_ What the hell just happened? _ Everyone seemed to be thinking.

“What’s going on, Sakura?” Chojuro finally asked, pushing to the front of the crowd that had gathered around Sakura and the paper bomb offender so that he could survey the scene. He had pulled his sword from his back, and held it in a ready position so that he would be poised to act at a moment’s notice. “He had a paper bomb?”

“I don’t know what happened,” Sakura growled into the face of the man she was holding down. “All I know is that  _ we _ were just strolling along when this man started walking towards  _ my _ Hokage with a paper bomb in his fist.”

Kakashi raised his eyebrows, surprised that Sakura had caught on to a potential threat before he had even sensed the presence of a malignant chakra. She must have been at the exact right position to notice the incoming threat. Although Kakashi would never underestimate her skills, he was sure that if the offender had come even another inch closer he would have been able to confront him even quicker than Sakura had.

“Let’s take him back to the Mizukage compound,” Kakashi ordered. “Mei will definitely have some questions for him.”

Chojuro nodded in agreement and extended his hand down to Sakura to help her up from the stone ground where her clothes were swiftly becoming soaked. Naruto and Yamato were behind her, ready to take the suspect from her as soon as she got up. Sakura shook her head at their offers of help, instead standing up on her own along with her prisoner. She easily yanked him up from the ground, unconcerned about his grunts of pain as she shoved his arms behind his back and kicked the back of his heels to get him to stand up.

“Don’t worry,” she said, false sweetness seeping between her teeth as she leaned around to look the much taller man in his eyes. “It would be my  _ pleasure _ to escort him to answer to the Mizukage. You guys just check him for any other weapons.”

Kakashi wondered if that was a gulp that he watched appear in the man’s throat or a trick of the light.

Chojuro, Naruto, and Yamato exchanged only a glance before they eagerly obliged Sakura. They dug around through the suspect’s clothes and bag simultaneously before eventually drawing back with nothing except for a small knife confiscated. Chojuro pocketed the knife and motioned for the rest of the team to follow him. They all resumed their path to the Mizukage’s compound at a much faster pace, even Kakashi. They swiftly left behind the gawking civilians, and if Sakura was perhaps holding onto their captive a little  _ too _ tightly and pushing him to go a  _ little  _ faster than the stout man could ordinarily manage, well, none of her companions thought to say anything.

With their newly refined speed, the group reached the Mizukage’s compound in no time at all. Chojuro directed several of the guards posted there to take their captive to one of the lower levels, where the interrogation rooms were held. With their hands free, everyone headed up to Mei’s office, their objective clear. It was highly suspicious that someone would attempt an attack on the visiting Hokage at the same time that a rebel faction opposing the alliance with that very Hokage had begun to make demands. Clearly, the situation was more complicated than they had initially thought.

“That was extremely unwise,” the Mizukage said once Chojuro had explained the situation to her. “To ask me for a meeting and then have one of their operatives perform an assassination mission not an hour later?”

“It seems that they are an extremely disorganized group, Mizukage-sama,” Chojuro said. “They may not have complete control of their members.”

Mei hummed. “Yamato, if you would please let me see the paper bomb you extracted.”

Yamato nodded before stepping forward and presenting the Mizukage with the neutralized paper bomb. Kakashi stepped forward along with him to look at the bomb over Mei’s shoulder. The seals inscribed upon it were relatively unsophisticated, though scrawled carefully and deliberately as if someone had been copying the markings from a book. Either their attacker had no idea what he was doing, or they wanted to make it seem that way. A paper bomb of that calibre wasn’t capable of blowing up a house of cards, let alone injuring an elite shinobi.

“This bomb is horribly constructed,” Kakashi remarked.

“They’re  _ idiots _ ,” Naruto exclaimed from somewhere next to the Mizukage’s desk. “Don’t worry, Mei-sama, we’ll take care of the rest of ‘em no problem!”

“It would appear that way, Naruto,” Yamato said. “But we shouldn’t be too hasty. None of their actions are making sense.”

Mei nodded. “Yes, I agree. I admire your enthusiasm, Naruto, but we shouldn’t jump into battle before fully assessing the situation. We don’t even know if this event and the contact I got from the rebel faction are related.”

“If I may, Mizukage-sama,” Sakura spoke up. “I’d like to offer a possible explanation.”

Mei raised her head with interest. “By all means, go ahead. Any information you have could guide us in interrogating the man you brought in.”

“Well, I think it’s possible that the attacker and the person who contacted you for a meeting are from the same group,” Sakura began. “And if my suspicions are correct, I think that their intentions are far more sinister than merely seeking an audience from you to voice their concerns about Kiri’s alliance with Konoha.”

Kakashi studied Sakura, who looked perfectly comfortable voicing her concerns to the leader of Kiri. She seemed unconcerned that her conjectures could be wrong, instead a resolute expression overtook her face.

“I think it’s possible that they’re using fear tactics,” Sakura continued. “You mentioned before that until now, they were roughing up random civilians, stealing minor wares from shops, and committing vandalism. This shows a clear escalation, and I think they are meaning to unsettle us and drive us to indecision.”

Mei nodded along. “That seems likely. It would be far too coincidental for this event to be separate from the rebels. But what would their actual motive be?”

“It seems like they don’t care for their operatives much at all,” Sakura said. She straightened her back from her previous position of studying the paper bomb. “They’re expendable, and the only type of motive that warrants that type of indifference isn’t a motive at all. I think they merely want to cause chaos, enough chaos for your people to start to doubt you.”

“That would make sense,” Chojuro said. “If we operated under the assumption that this was their very public way to make us agree to a meeting, then Mei-sama would certainly meet with the rebel leaders. And that would give them an opportunity to launch an attack on an even greater scale.”

“Exactly,” Sakura replied. “Which would cause some of the civilians to doubt your decisions. And if they’re willing to harm the leader of a village that isn’t even their own, think of what they would do to the subject of their hatred?”

“They aren’t looking to make demands,” Kakashi surmised. “They’re looking to make war.”

Sakura smiled, though the expression was absent of any humor. “That’s my concern. And if it’s true, then they may not be disorganized at all.”

“It would certainly make sense. People have been struggling to force Kiri back into the days of the Bloody Mist ever since the Fourth Mizukage died.” Mei said as she folded her hands underneath her chin. “Either they truly did send an unskilled shinobi to murder Kakashi-sama, or they forged an ineffectual paper bomb to lull us into a false sense of security.”

“Should I tell the interrogation team about this, Mei-sama?” Chojuro asked.

“Yes, yes, go now,” Mei said. Chojuro left the office instantly, determination blatant on his fast. “And as for all my friends from Konoha, I’m afraid that your original mission has turned out to be far more complicated than you signed up for. I understand if you wish to return home; I wouldn’t want to place you in more danger.”

“Nonsense, Mei,” Kakashi said with a shake of his head. “Konoha never turns down a friend in need.”

Even as Mei smiled up at him grimly, Yamato interrupted. “Forgive me, Hokage-sama, but the enemy has already made an attempt to harm you, and it would be irresponsible of us as your guard to continue to place you in harm’s way.”

Kakashi wanted to roll his eyes. Of course his attentive guard would prevent him from getting to see any battle on the one rare opportunity he had to leave the village. And of  _ course _ Yamato had been the one to voice these concerns.

“Your shinobi is right, Hokage-sama,” Mei said. “I’ll arrange for some of my guard to escort you all from the village as soon as possible.”

“Mah, well, I’m sure a compromise can be made,” Kakashi offered. “I’ll leave the rest of my team at your disposal, and I’ll head back home to Konoha to inform them of the change in plans.”

“I’ll come with you,” Sakura said as she stepped away from the desk and walked towards him. “Someone needs to accompany you to ensure your safety, and Yamato-taichou and Naruto are much better suited to espionage and extracting information than I am.”

Kakashi couldn’t help but to agree. Yamato had been trained for many years in Anbu, a faction of shinobi that prided themselves on being able to conduct entire missions completely unseen and unheard. Naruto was also particularly influential, and although he had trouble with remaining silent, his brute strength and persistence were especially useful when espionage turned to a confrontation. Sakura, on the other hand, while strong, certainly didn’t have a style very conducive to espionage. In addition, she didn’t have the benefit of hundreds of kage bunshin in the event that they were ambushed by entire enemy squadrons. Naruto, as Hokage-in-training, was also uniquely qualified to make any necessary negotiations with Mei on behalf of Konoha. Not to mention, a medic was always seen as the most practical escort for a Hokage.

“Then it’s settled,” Mei said. “If Naruto and Yamato don’t mind, they will stay here to assist us with getting more information on the enemy while Sakura escorts Hokage-sama back to Konoha. I truly appreciate all of your help thus far.”

Kakashi tried not to notice the giddy smile that spread over Mei’s face as she watched him and Sakura walk out of the office side by side. If Mei thinking he was already -  _ ahem _ \- attached to someone else kept her from making any advances towards him, who was he to deny it? His only real frustration was that after Sakura’s tremendous display of deductive reasoning today, he could no longer only view her as a mere annoyance. It almost made him feel guilty for forcing her to go through endless piles of paperwork in his sweltering office.

Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A quick Google revealed to me that Anzu means apricot. My hamster's name is Apricot. You do the math.
> 
> So, I didn't meet my self-imposed deadline, but are we surprised? I know of no fic author who has managed to meet a deadline. Absolutely none. I'm also in grad school and it's finals week, so I'm surprised I even got a chapter out at all. If it's any consolation, this chapter is a bit longer. But I do promise that I'll try to continue this fic in as timely of a manner as possible. I have no intentions of abandoning it (and if I do you'll be the first to know).
> 
> Thanks so much for the positive response so far! See you next chapter.


	5. In which Sakura breaks something

When Sakura woke up, she had a piece of her own hair halfway down her throat and drool coming down the side of her cheek, venturing closer and closer to her ear. She shook her head frantically, trying to dislodge the strand of hair while simultaneously hoping the rapid whiplash would wake her up enough to be alert. She had fallen asleep in a heap the night before, just barely making her consciousness last long enough to tap Kakashi on the shoulder before she collapsed on her bed roll. For some reason, Sakura felt guilty having her Hokage watch over her while she slept, but she also knew it was necessary with only two of them and the threat of Kiri’s insurgents to worry about. As a compromise with herself, Sakura had decided to take the first watch for the past three nights, each time pushing herself as far as she could into the waning morning hours to wake up Kakashi for his own shift. She knew it was unprofessional, but she just couldn’t withstand the embarrassment of having such an elite shinobi essentially babysitting her. Especially not when she had been trying to impress him for  _ weeks _ now with her abilities as a kunoichi. Unfortunately for her, their personalities seemed to clash too much for that to actually happen.

Laying there partly in the dirt and partly on her bed roll, Sakura tried to wake herself up by taking stock of her surroundings. Above her, she could see the lush, green forest canopy through the filter of the large branches she and Kakashi had used to form their tent. Without Yamato and his wood cabins, they had definitely been roughing it, to put it lightly. She could also feel the wet soil clinging onto her back and seeping through her clothes. They might have been miles away from Kiri, but the forests of Fire Country were nothing if not prosperous -- and with that came an abundance of moisture. She could just barely tell that the sun was still rising, it’s orange glow creeping across the ground and making its slow way through the opening of the makeshift hut. She suspected that Kakashi was currently outside, if the sounds of rustling leaves were anything to go by. All in all, everything seemed pretty calm. It was a good sign, especially since they had been concerned about someone following them ever since their initial departure from Kiri.

The day that they had decided to leave Kiri to avoid another attack on Kakashi, Mei had suggested that they stay for one more night before leaving for the next morning, hoping that they would be well rested enough to make their trip back to Konoha much more quickly in the long run. Besides, Sakura’s chakra had already been depleted by her time spent in the hospital that day. Yamato and Sakura, as Kakashi’s guards, agreed vehemently. Though, Sakura had added on the final condition of having herself guard Kakashi while they slept. Surely, they had set up enough seals and defenses in his room to deter the average dangerous criminal, but they weren’t sure what kind of force they were dealing with. So, for some added assurance and peace of mind, Sakura had pulled up her bed roll right next to Kakashi’s bed and slept with a kunai in her hand the entire night. Kakashi had begrudgingly went along with her decision, though he had nearly cracked once Sakura woke him up before dawn the next morning. She had already packed up both hers  _ and _ Kakashi’s things, to his great annoyance, and was ushering him out the door to begin their trek to Konoha.

The next day of travel passed almost uneventfully, if not for the fact that each of them had been steadily increasing their pace as if to outrun the other. Over the past two days and three nights, it had seemed that both elite shinobi were in some sort of silent competition to see who could get the other to crack first. There really was no logic to it, considering the fact that they  _ had _ to stay together. But as soon as Kakashi would pick up his speed the slightest amount, Sakura was right on his heels and would push herself even faster if only to be an inch ahead of him at all times. It was incredibly tiring, and they had decided to camp out a little earlier than they normally would to regain energy. Of course, the next day brought more of the same. This only added to Sakura’s exhaustion, and when she had again volunteered to take the first watch, she knew she would be struggling to keep her eyes open most of the night.

Finally feeling alert and refreshed, Sakura sat up from the ground and stretched before she steadily began packing up her bedroll and other miscellaneous belongings. Once that was finished, she made her way out of the tent and deconstructed it with one swift kick to some of the supporting branches. With her bag packed and overnight lodgings demolished, Sakura turned around to spot the hokage poking at a small fire just a few steps away from their camp.

“What time is it?” Sakura asked.

Kakashi briefly looked up at the sky to gauge the position of the sun. “Hm, maybe six.”

Sakura sluggishly strolled over to the fire Kakashi was stoking and plopped down, setting her backpack behind her so she could lean on it. It seemed that Kakashi was being a little shorter with her than usual. His eyes were as stony as ever, but there was something in his clipped tone that bothered her. Of course, she had long since been aware of the fact that she annoyed him. She couldn’t deny that it was fun sometimes, but this morning seemed a little different to Sakura. She wondered if this was his new way of continuing their unspoken competition, this time a silent game.

With a sigh, Sakura figured that there was no use in trying to elicit some form of conversation from the Hokage. Besides, he was busy with the fire and it was still much too early for her to extend much brain power into pestering him until he eventually gave in. That was more of a midday sorta thing for her, especially when she didn’t have the help of Yamato’s clumsiness or Naruto’s tactlessness. Instead of trying to beat him at his own game, Sakura decided to simply lean back on her palms, point her face to the sky, and soak in the sunlight and sounds of birds chirping nearby.

That is, until Kakashi broke the silence himself.

“Did you know you snore?” Kakashi said without looking at her.

“ _ Excuse me _ ?” she screeched. She whipped her head around to look at him incredulously, but his mask-covered face was impassive as ever. “I do not snore! I’m a shinobi, I sleep silently.”

“Okay well, tell that to all of the forest animals that you scared away in your sleep.” Kakashi shrugged. “It’s lucky no one has been following us. They would have found our camp the first night.”

Sakura scrunched up her nose. Obviously something was bothering him. She was beginning to consider herself an expert on annoying the Hokage, and usually when he was this direct with an insult it meant that she had pushed him past his breaking point. Typically, Sakura would consider that a small victory before backing off some to avoid an insubordination strike on her record, but this time she couldn’t think of anything she had done wrong. She had woken him up for his shift as usual, and even cleaned up their tent without starting in on teasing him. She had been the model mission partner!

“If I snore, then why haven’t any of my teammates told me before?” Sakura asked, not giving him a chance to answer. “And even  _ if _ I snored, I would know how to stop it.”

“Would you?” Kakashi blinked at her briefly.

“Yes, I’m a medic,” Sakura sniffed. “I learned how to fix a deviated septum before I was thirteen, Hokage-sama.”

Wordlessly, Kakashi started to set a pot on the fire that he had coaxed into a pretty healthy flame. He had just filled the pot with a water jutsu when Sakura halted him with a hand around his arm. Kakashi glanced at the offending appendage before staring at Sakura’s face. 

“What are you doing?” she asked, as if he had accosted her in some way. The yin seal on her forehead distorted as she knitted her eyebrows together, resembling more of a line instead of a diamond.

“I’m making breakfast,” he explained, pacing his words especially slow for her benefit.

“No, I know what you’re doing,” Sakura scoffed. “I’m wondering why you’re doing it.”

Kakashi sighed. “It’s morning. People tend to eat food in the morning.”

“Give it to me,” Sakura ordered, switching her hand from gripping his arm to gripping the handle of the pot. “You’re the Hokage, you shouldn’t be doing camp chores.”

_ Besides _ , Sakura thought. She didn’t want to give him an actual reason to use that surly tone of his. Instead, she was going to be the perfect teammate and cook breakfast.

He yanked the pot back out of her grasp and back onto the fire. “I’m perfectly capable of cooking.”

“That’s not what I’m saying,” Sakura said. She snatched the cooking utensil back and pulled the small container of rice out of the pack beside her. “I’m just saying you shouldn’t have to.”

“Well, I was awake. I should start the food.” He pulled it back.

“Did you not get enough sleep last night? Is that the problem?” Water splashed out of the pot as Sakura yanked it back towards her chest. “Next time I just won’t wake you up for your shift!”

“No need.”  _ Splash _ . Kakashi smiled cheekily. “Your snoring would wake me up, anyway.”

Sakura gasped, perhaps pulling back the pot with a little more force than was necessary this time. “I do not snore!”

“You do,” Kakashi insisted. “And you’re also an awful cook.”

This time, Sakura actually shoved the pot back into his hands with enough force that he had to lean backwards to keep it from hitting him in the face. He had to move so quickly that he lost his balance, and in trying to put his hands on the ground to right himself, he had tilted the pot just enough. In a flash, the entire pot of water had spilled all over Kakashi’s front, soaking his flak vest and mask.

Sakura covered her mouth with her hand and stared on in horror.

Kakashi slowly moved his eyes up to her face and gave her perhaps the coldest glare that she had even seen. She couldn’t even detect any anger, he was just so callous. If she wasn’t in trouble before, she was surely in trouble now. There was no way she was going to have a job once they got back to the village. The moment Kakashi put his ceremonial robes back on and was seated behind his desk in the Hokage tower, she was going to be put on bedpan duty for the rest of her mortal life. All because she had done  _ something _ the night before to set him off.

“Sor-” Sakura began.

“Let’s spar,” Kakashi interrupted.

“Sorry, what?” Sakura reeled back. Surely he wasn’t asking her to a  _ fight _ in the middle of a forest -- a forest where no one was around for  _ miles _ . A fleeting thought that maybe Kakashi wanted to murder her in secret passed through Sakura’s head, but it didn’t have much time to make itself at home before Kakashi spoke again.

“Let’s. Spar.” Kakashi stood up slowly, the pot abandoned on the forest floor beside him as he dusted himself off. He looked down at her casually, as if he hadn’t asked her such a confusing request.

For a few moments, the only sounds around them were the chirps of a few birds passing overhead as Sakura squinted up at him.

“I’m not going to fight you,” she finally said.

“And why not?” Kakashi said. He began adjusting his gloves and stretching out his shoulders.

Sakura could think of a million reasons. Firstly, he seemed to have some sort of vendetta against her and would  _ surely _ be able to cause her some serious bodily harm and even be able to get away with it. Secondly, she was certain that there was some sort of rule in her shinobi contract that mentioned something about protecting the Hokage at all costs. Fighting with him while he was angry definitely didn’t fit in with that rule, even if a friendly spar would have. Finally… well finally, Sakura was a little bit disappointed in herself.

She had walked into his office so many nights ago, confused as to why the Hokage himself would call upon her personally at such a late hour. She had just finished her shift at the hospital and was looking forward to a lazy night at home, but of course a request from the Hokage couldn’t be ignored. Sakura was surprised to learn that he was injured, and even more surprised that he had asked  _ her _ to heal him. Kakashi’s reputation of having a bit of a phobia against medical intervention was very well known, and Sakura knew that he rarely allowed anyone other than Tsunade or Shizune to heal him. It was that moment that Sakura had decided to take advantage of the opportunity presented to her. When she had approached Tsunade years ago to become her shishou, it was Sakura’s tenacity and boldness that endeared her to the Slug Queen. Sakura knew that if she was going to impress Kakashi, she had to stand out. Unfortunately, her decision to be bold had backfired, leading to Kakashi finding her annoying. She figured that it wasn’t so bad, if he was at least considering her for escort missions and tolerating her presence. He had even defended her to Ao! But apparently it was all in vain, if he had been driven to the point of wanting to come to blows with her.

But that was all too hard to voice in the moment, as Sakura’s throat had started to form a lump. Instead, she said, “I don’t want to break your hip.”

“Stand up,” Kakashi ordered. He immediately settled into a ready stance, his limbs loose in preparation to either dodge or counter anything that was thrown at him.

Sakura flinched. She really hadn’t intended to tease him yet again. It had just become such an easy routine for her, something that she had previously thought Kakashi even enjoyed if only a tiny bit. It was obvious now that he didn’t think much of her at all, and Sakura’s shame began to eat away at her in the form of a twisting gut and sweating brow.

“I’m really sorry, Hokage-sama,” Sakura tried. “I promise I--”

“For the last time, Haruno,” Kakashi interrupted. “Just stand up. And fight me.”

With a shaky sigh, Sakura hesitantly brought herself to her feet. She dawdled as much as she could, making a show of dusting the dirt and leaves off herself before settling into a poor excuse for a fighting stance. At this point, there really was no way to get herself out of this mess. She was going to have to spar with the Hokage, of all people, and it was all her own doing. She let out a curse under her breath, but beyond that made no attempts to swing at Kakashi. She may have to go along with the fight to please him, but there was no way she was going to take the first punch. That way, she might be able to claim self defense if she was reprimanded later for making attempts to harm the Hokage.

“Are we using chakra or--”

Once again, Sakura couldn’t finish her sentence. Her voice was broken off with a swift punch from Kakashi flying at her face. Sakura immediately ducked, and was put on the defensive as he continued to pursue her. Kakashi was pushing her back, steadily stalking towards her as she was forced to backtrack into the surrounding forest. Sakura tried her best to merely keep up with the onslaught of attacks against her, quickly finding herself breathing heavily as Kakashi’s assault never let up. At least her question about chakra had been answered; Kakashi was only leveling melee attacks against her, no chakra as a supplement to his attacks and no jutsus to be seen. It would be a taijutsu battle only, it seemed.

Sakura had been fending off his kicks and punches for a while when she suddenly felt her back slam against the trunk of a tree. Sakura’s eyes went wide, just barely having time to notice that Kakashi wasn’t even breaking a sweat before he leveled another punch at her. She ducked under his arm as he swung, leaping away to put some distance between them before she whipped around to face him again. At this point, the spar was never going to end. He wasn’t even getting tired, and yet she was absolutely gasping trying to take some air into her lungs. As much as she hated the idea, she was going to have to try to land a hit.

Sakura started towards him, not having much time to second guess herself before he recovered from his missed attack and came at her again. As he turned away from the tree, she could have sworn she saw a flash of a smile dance in his eyes once he realized she was approaching. However, just as quickly as it appeared it was gone and Sakura was getting much too close to worry about a damn _ sparkle _ in his eye. Instead, she gauged the distance between them and decided to try to knock him off balance. She crouched low, aiming at his center of gravity and pulled her fist back into a punch. With a shift of her dominant foot and a twist in her torso, her fist pushed forward in an inevitable collision course with Kakashi’s middle. Sakura was inwardly horrified, hoping beyond all hope that Kakashi would be able to jump away and somehow come to his senses enough to end the fight. But the reality was that she had gotten way too close for Kakashi to be able to fully dodge her attack. Her fist was going to land on him one way or another, and there was no denying it.

Indeed, Sakura’s fist did land. Her knuckles made contact with the inside of Kakashi’s palm, as he was able to divert her attack to a much less vulnerable body part in the final few moments before it landed. The force behind Sakura’s punch caused them to skid backwards a few feet, both of them digging their heels into the ground to try to slow their progression into the rest of the forest. Once they had finally come to a stop, Sakura was prepared to leap back and put some distance between them once again. However, Kakashi was too quick. He used his grip on her fist to pull her closer, wrapping his other arm around her middle to grasp her tightly against his chest. Sakura grunted from the force, all of the air leaving her lungs in a rush. 

Kakashi chuckled, and Sakura could feel his muscles begin to shift to turn her around, his grip loosening and hand shifting from her fist to her wrist. Somewhere in a deep corner of her mind, Sakura registered that she should take advantage of the moment to get out of his hold. Instead, something about Kakashi’s laugh had frozen her in place. Her cheeks quickly got hot, and she was all too aware of how tightly she was pressed against her opponent. Kakashi was just about to flip her around, and probably pin her to the ground with her hands behind her back if the way he gripped her shoulder was any sort of indication. He would almost undoubtedly end the battle there, with her pinned beneath him, but Sakura was suddenly struck with a surge of panic. He was far,  _ far _ too close and she couldn’t possibly allow him to win.

The panic produced within her a sudden rush of adrenaline, and she was able to somehow shift out of his grip at the last moment. She lifted her foot to step off of his knee and backflip away from him, knowing that the sudden push on the knee that was holding him up would knock him off balance and release his hold on her. However, Kakashi hadn’t been anticipating her to move at the last second, instead assuming like she had that the spar was over. Instead of bracing his leg against the ground to keep steady like Sakura predicted he would, Kakashi had actually stepped forward. She miscalculated her own kick, instead hitting a little bit lower than she intended and pushing off of Kakashi’s shin. Kakashi immediately let go of her. This threw her entire trajectory off, having used more force than necessary in her panic and beginning her leap away from him at a much different height than she had measured for. She wasn’t able to complete the flip she had intended, instead flying backward with her arms flailing before finally landing pretty harshly and promptly on her ass.

Immediately, Sakura yelled out in pain. She flattened herself onto the ground, clutching behind her to try to add some pressure that would even out the pain that was radiating up her spine. She laid there thrashing about for what seemed like forever before Kakashi popped his head into her line of sight above her head. His messy gray hair and furrowed brows blocked out the glare of the sun. Embarrassment took over, and Sakura’s already hot cheeks grew even hotter.

“Are you alright?” Kakashi asked. He knelt down beside her, all traces of anger long gone from his voice. It seemed that the fight had served its initial purpose to make Kakashi feel better. Sakura was just disappointed that it had to come at her expense.

“Just,” Sakura gasped. “Just a little bruise, nothing major.”

Kakashi squinted at her, concern quickly taking residence in his charcoal eyes. “I really didn’t mean to hurt you. I just wanted to spar so that you’d stop being so careful around me.”

Briefly, Sakura forgot the pain that was boring its way through her sacrum and allowed herself to be confused. Kakashi had thought she was being careful around him? Flashes of their past few nights passed through Sakura’s head, but she couldn’t figure out what he meant. They had been essentially racing each other to Konoha, there wasn’t really much of a chance for her to be  _ careful _ with him. She had been too busy trying to breathe and keep herself awake during her night watch.

“You had been forcing yourself to stay awake,” Kakashi explained, correctly identifying the confusion all over Sakura’s face. “To make my shifts as short as possible.”

Even through the pain, Sakura had the humility to feel properly ashamed. He was right of course, she had been doing exactly that. She hadn’t intended to patronize him or underestimate him in any way, she just hadn’t felt that the Hokage deserved to do anything so undignified. Looking back, however, she could definitely see how he was so short with her that morning. 

“You must be in a lot of pain,” Kakashi said. He made an attempt to touch her shoulder and roll her over to look at her injury, but Sakura stopped him with a wide-eyed stare and a hand over his.

“My fault, really,” Sakura said, cringing at her moment of panic during their spar. “I just… misjudged my step. I’ll feel better in a bit, no need to worry.”

Kakashi tilted his head. “You’re obviously hurt. Just let me take a look, you might have cut yourself on a rock.”

That definitely wasn’t it. Even if Sakura wasn’t an experienced medic, she could definitely tell the difference between a broken bone and a cut. The pulsating pain she felt from her pelvis was undoubtedly from a broken bone. It just had to be from perhaps the most embarrassing bone on the body.

Sakura shook her head and bit her lip. “That’s not it.”

“Then what is it?” Kakashi shifted into a sitting position beside her, his hand leaving her shoulder and instead resting on his outstretched knee.

Sakura mumbled, “I broke my sacrum.”

“Pardon?”

“The bone at the base of your spine,” she said just as quietly.

“Sakura, speak up.”

“Fine!” Sakura shouted. “I broke the bone in my ass. Was that loud enough?”

Kakashi stared at her for a moment. Then he blinked. Until, finally, he let out a small, lilting laugh. Sakura had never heard anything like that from him before, but she found it to be particularly annoying at that moment. She expected it really, the entire situation being pretty ridiculous. But that didn’t make her any more accepting of it.

“You don’t have to mock me,” Sakura grumbled. “You’re the one that wanted to spar.”

“Sorry,” Kakashi said once he recovered. His mirth was obvious in the way his eyes glimmered. “Let’s get you to the hospital. The village is only half a day’s trip away, and I can carry you.”

“No way!” Sakura yelped. She tried to sit up, but the pain wouldn’t let her. Instead she settled for raising herself up onto her elbows. “Just give me a second to heal myself and then we can be on our way.”

Kakashi rolled his eyes before he stood up and walked over to their campsite. He carelessly threw both of their packs over his shoulders and put out their fire with a few kicks of dirt. Once he was finished, he strode back over to Sakura and held out a hand.

“You can’t possibly heal yourself in these conditions,” Kakashi said, the tease obvious in his easy tone as he recalled the words she had spoken herself on the first night they met beyond official duties. “Besides, it might expend a lot of your chakra, and then we’d be making it back to Konoha even later. There are people expecting us, and if we don’t head back soon they’ll suspect that we were ambushed by some of the rebels.”

Sakura pouted. She had to admit that he was being pretty logical. Fractures usually took a long time to heal completely with medical ninjutsu, which she would have to do if she had any hope of making it back to Konoha by foot. If she took too long, the council would undoubtedly send a search team for them, since the estimated arrival date they had originally stated in their message from Kiri would expire at midnight. It really didn’t make sense for her to try to heal herself. It was better to make it home safely and quickly instead of sticking around in uncharted territory where it still wasn’t confirmed that the Kiri rebels weren’t pursuing them.

“Fine.” Sakura covered her face with her hands. “But you aren’t allowed to tell  _ anyone _ .”

Kakashi chuckled. “Fair enough. Now would you prefer piggyback or bridal style?”

Sakura groaned. “Just pick me up!”

With one final laugh, Kakashi obliged. He knelt down and wrapped one arm around her shoulders and the other beneath her knees. He hefted her up off the ground easily, cradling her against his chest and making sure she was secure before leaping up onto a nearby tree branch. It took him only a second to orient himself to the direction he was supposed to start towards, and then he was racing off at a steady running pace. Sakura decided to keep her eyes closed, figuring the image of his face would just cause way too much embarrassment for her to handle. She had to admit that it was nice to alleviate some of the pressure on her fracture that had been caused by laying on the hard forest floor, and she knew that she definitely wouldn’t have been able to walk let alone race through the trees beside Kakashi. It was definitely the most sound option, but that didn’t mean she had to be happy about being carried through the forest by the Hokage.

They settled into an almost comfortable silence, each attempt on Kakashi’s part to start a conversation disrupted by a harsh  _ shush _ from Sakura. If she had to be carried, she wasn’t going to make it any worse with casual banter. Instead, she settled her lips into a firm line and only opened her eyes every now and again to gauge how close they were getting to the village gates. They were making good time, actually. It seemed that Kakashi’s pace was impervious to the added burden of carrying two packs and an immobile kunoichi. The last stretch of their trip usually would have taken around half a day, but Kakashi actually managed to make it to the village gates in only six hours. Sakura wondered if he had been holding back on her the past couple of days during their impromptu races, but didn’t have much time to entertain the thought before they were making their way through the gates.

Sakura allowed herself to open her eyes then as Kakashi slowed to a leisurely walk. She glanced over at the watch post right inside the gate to notice that there were several people gathered. She recognized a few of them as jonin and chunin she had worked with in the past, most noticeably of which was Akimichi Choji. Sakura immediately covered her face with her hands, hoping to go unnoticed by one-third of the Ino-Shika-Cho formation. It was already embarrassing enough to be seen in the village, not just injured but also being carried by the Rokudaime. But she wouldn’t be able to handle it if the information got back to Yamanaka Ino, and Choji was a direct line to that relentless gossip that she called a best friend.

“Don’t stop,” Sakura hissed to Kakashi, tugging on the collar of his flak vest to bring his ear closer to her mouth. “Just head straight through the gate, don’t answer any questions.”

Kakashi smiled down at her, exasperation obvious in the way the corners of his eyes crinkled. “Come on, Sakura, no one’s gonna care that you’re--”

“Hokage-sama?” Choji called. “And is that Sakura? What happened?”

As Sakura yelped and hid her face even deeper into Kakashi’s chest, Kakashi sighed. It appeared that they wouldn’t be making their way through the gates unnoticed.

“Ah, well we just have to make it to the hospital, Choji,” Kakashi answered. “Don’t mind us!”

“The hospital?” Choji exclaimed. “Let us help you! We can get a stretcher, just hold on.”

Noticing the way Sakura’s hold on his vest tightened, Kakashi shook his head. “No need, it will be quicker this way. Thank you for your concern, but you can head back to work.”

Neither Choji nor his other colleagues at the watchpost voiced any more arguments, the Hokage’s dismissal ringing clear in the indirect order he gave. Sakura silently thanked the gods that she would be able to make it to the hospital without much of a fuss or having to explain the nature of her injury. The hospital was closeby, and if they hurried along the rooftops, then she could make it through the village relatively unseen.

“Thank you, Kakashi-sama,” Sakura sighed. “Now once we get to the hospital, there’s a room on the top floor that’s always locked. Just drop me off there, and I’ll heal myself.”

To Sakura’s surprise, Kakashi didn’t take to the rooftops. Instead, he was leisurely strolling along the walkway from the gate and into the center of the village where the hospital was. Sakura’s heart began to race.

“Uh, Kakashi-sama?” Sakura said. “People are going to see.”

Kakashi glanced down at her, apparently unconcerned. “My legs are tired,” he explained.

Sakura narrowed her eyes at his obvious lie. Kakashi’s pace hadn’t let up at all in their entire trek back to the village, and he wasn’t even breathing that hard. There was no way his legs were too tired for a few extra jumps across some rooftops.

“Well maybe you can just drop me off somewhere else,” Sakura suggested. “My apartment is close, and I wouldn’t want you to exhaust yourself.”

Kakashi shrugged, jostling her as she layed in his arms. “I just want to make sure you get properly checked out.”

“I can check myself out just fine,” Sakura protested.

Kakashi didn’t respond, and they were quickly nearing the main walkway in front of the hospital. Sakura’s fight or flight instinct kicked in, causing her to thrash as much as she could in his arms.

“Stay still,” he ordered evenly.

“Let me go!” Sakura said.

It was too late, however. Just as Sakura finished her final protest, they had stepped out from the cover of some of the more residential buildings and into the main plaza in front of the hospital. It was absolutely bustling, many civilians and shinobi alike crossing through on their individual errands from all over the village. Even if Sakura couldn’t fully see the extent of the crowd from her position in Kakashi’s arms, she could definitely hear it. The plaza was absolutely roaring with the cumulative effects of dozens of individual conversations. There was no way Sakura would be able to make it to the hospital unseen, now.

“Oh god,” Sakura lamented before reverting back to the tried and true tactic of covering her face. Nevermind the fact that she had incredibly distinctive, bright pink hair.

Kakashi continued on, completely unperturbed. Sakura could hear the many conversations immediately near her hush as they made their way through the crowd, the clear spectacle of the Hokage carrying an incapacitated girl through the middle of the village drawing their attention away from their daily routines. As they passed through, the quiet quickly turned back into the buzz of excited conversations, this time surely centering around some sort of gossip.

It wasn’t far too late, in Sakura’s opinion, when they finally made their way through the doors of the hospital. Sakura could tell immediately, the cool rush of air and scent of cleaning supplies rushing over her, quickly followed by a sense of relief. Finally, she was where she felt most comfortable. And, of course, where medics were bound by confidentiality to protect the identities of all patients.

Sakura was just about to direct Kakashi to a private trauma room where he could drop her off and she could finally heal herself, but of course the universe just wouldn’t give her any break. Instead, she was interrupted by the voice of one of the people at reception.

“Hokage-sama? And is that Haruno Sakura?” he said. “What happened?”

Sakura glanced up to see one that it was one of the receptionists, though his name was escaping her at the moment. Of course, he would know who  _ she _ was. And inevitably, her name would make it back to Tsunade. She didn’t even want to imagine the kind of reprimand she would be getting from her long-time master. 

“Please clear out a trauma room for me,” Sakura said as sweetly as she could manage. “I’ll be in and out, no need to worry.”

“Could you get Shizune, actually?” Kakashi said, promptly undercutting her. She may be the assistant director of the hospital, but the Hokage’s word was final no matter where they were in the village. “Sakura got injured on our mission and needs immediate medical attention.”

“Right away, Hokage-sama,” the receptionist said before getting on the intercom and paging Shizune to the emergency department. A few nurses that were nearby brought a gurney over to Kakashi, locking the brakes and lowering the bedrail so that Kakashi could lay Sakura down. Sakura was relieved that she didn’t have to be carried anymore, but she was already attracting way too much attention. There was no way that her little incident wouldn’t be making it through the gossip mill by dinner time.

Sakura cleared her throat and fussed with the pillow behind her head, resolutely not meeting Kakashi’s gaze as the nurses took her vitals. “Thank you Hokage-sama for your help, but I’m sure you have a lot of important work to return to.”

“Nonsense,” he said. “I couldn’t leave a teammate when they were injured. I’ll stick around until Shizune gives you a clean bill of health.”

Sakura glared, the cheerful look on his face all too suspicious. Before she could comment on it, the nurses began asking her questions to see if there was a risk of head injury.

Shizune appeared rather quickly following the page. She rushed to Sakura’s side, sparing a confused glance at Kakashi before accepting the notes from the nurses that had been checking her over.

“Your vitals look stable,” Shizune said. “What happened to you?”

“I broke my sacrum,” Sakura explained, a flush spreading over her cheeks.

Again, Shizune looked up at Kakashi. “How did that happen?”

“We had a friendly spar,” Kakashi explained for her.

“Is that so?” Shizune’s eyes widened a bit before she directed her attention to one of the nurses. “Follow me to trauma one. I have a student with me today, so you should page him as well.”

Sakura gulped, even as the nurse began to undo the brakes and put the bedrail back up. Without missing a beat, she and Shizune began pushing Sakura’s gurney down the hallway. Kakashi followed closely behind, both the nurse and Shizune sharing a look at that before silently deciding it wasn’t their place to deny his presence. 

“Excuse me,” Sakura murmured. She placed a hesitant hand on Shizune’s elbow. “Did you say you have a student with you today?”

“Yeah,” Shizune said nonchalantly. She began directing Sakura’s gurney into the doorway of one of the trauma rooms, the nurse following closely behind and helping her secure the gurney at the center of the room. “His name is Daisuke. He hasn’t seen a pelvic fracture yet, so this will be a good opportunity for him.”

Sakura flung an arm over her forehead. Of course it would be her luck that a student would be training on  _ her _ . As annoyed as she was, she was also a softie for educating the youth, especially when it was in medical ninjutsu. Not many young ninja were interested in healing, especially not with bullheaded role models like Naruto running around. They were a rare breed, and Sakura wouldn’t let her embarrassment disrupt the education of one of their best and brightest recruits.

“He better be good,” she said instead.

“Oh he is,” Shizune reassured as she helped the nurse transport Sakura onto her stomach. “You’re lucky, too, because he really has a knack for bone healing!”

“Lucky me,” Sakura groaned into her pillow. She turned her head to the side to find that Kakashi was making himself at home in a chair in the corner of the small room. He offered her a cheerful wave.

Before long, a knock sounded at the door and a young boy poked his head in. He was frail looking with blond hair and glasses, but overall he seemed self-assured. It was rare for a young student to be so confident, and Sakura could immediately tell why Shizune had praised him. At least the student working on her would be competent, Sakura thought.

“You called for me, Shizune-sensei?” Daisuke asked. He glanced over at Sakura on the hospital bed and continued in a whisper. “Is that  _ the _ Haruno Sakura?”

From the corner of the room, Kakashi sniffed petulantly. Daisuke paid him no mind.

Shizune only glanced at Kakashi before turning back to Daisuke. “Come on in, Daisuke. We have a sacral fracture with possible extension to the rest of the pelvic girdle. Vitals are stable and the patient is alert and oriented times three.”

Daisuke nodded before making his way over to the table. The nurse stepped aside to give him room and grabbed the medical chart from the end of Sakura’s bed to begin charting all of the medical orders.

They quickly set to work, setting up a privacy curtain around Sakura’s waist so that the Hokage wouldn’t be subjected to a view of his subordinate’s bare ass. Kakashi sat quietly the entire time, politely twiddling his thumbs and glancing around the room to entertain himself. Sakura tried to distract herself from his presence by listening to the way Shizune instructed Daisuke. She started by asking him to outline the typical procedure for a sacral fracture, then guided him as he began the medical ninjutsu.

“Don’t forget to alleviate the inflammation by extending your chakra to the surrounding area,” Shizune advised. “It will really help with her pain and avoiding any complications later on.”

“Like this?” Daisuke asked.

“Great!” Shizune said. “Now, let me help you. The break is pretty extensive, and with two of us working, her recovery will be much faster.”

Figuring the addition of an extra medic -- albeit a medic in training -- was a blessing in disguise, Sakura inwardly celebrated the fact that her stay in the hospital would be much shorter than the typical time for a fracture like hers. The hospital was usually incredibly busy, and medics were usually in short supply because of it. She was sure that her embarrassment would never fully dissipate, but at least she was lucky enough to have two medics working on her to shorten the duration of her torture.

It  _ was _ incredibly mortifying to have not one, but two people staring intently at her backside. Granted, they were medical professionals, but it still made her feel pretty exposed. Not to mention the fact that their esteemed Hokage was in the same room as her naked buttcheeks, and even if he couldn’t see it, his proximity was still embarrassing enough. She supposed she could have requested that he be removed, but he was actually being rather polite in his corner of the room.

Their gazes locked just as Sakura had that thought, and when she noticed his eyes squinting into a cheerful smile, she immediately rethought her previous statement. He wasn’t being polite, he was being a  _ nuisance _ . But it was too late to kick him out, as he would surely see her backside on his way out the door. Maybe she could convince the nurse to sedate her?

Eventually, Shizune and Daisuke completed their healing jutsu and covered Sakura back up. She tested out whether or not she had regained function in the area by stretching a little bit. Finding no pain, she then turned around to sit upright. Her butt was in full working order once again.

“Thank you both,” Sakura said, relief flooding through her at the fact that her ordeal was nearing an end.

“What did I tell you?” Shizune said. “Daisuke is a natural when it comes to orthopedics!”

The young student blushed, promptly bowing to Sakura before heading out the door, along with the nurse who had finished charting. Shizune stayed behind, helping Sakura to her feet.

“I’m sure you know, but make sure to refrain from any strenuous activity for at least a week,” Shizune said. “But feel free to leave, and let me know if you have any problems.”

“You don’t think I traumatized the poor kid with my ass, do you?” Sakura joked. She started gathering her pack from the floor and straightening her clothes.

“I’m sure he’s seen worse,” Kakashi said with a clap of his hands as he stood up from his chair.

With a small giggle, Shizune covered her mouth with a delicate hand. Sakura had  _ almost _ forgotten that Kakashi was there, but now was mortified all over again at having him hear her insult her own butt.

“I’m sure he’ll find a way to continue with his medical studies,” Shizune said, breaking the tension. “And Hokage-sama, it was very kind of you to make sure that Sakura was alright, but I expect she’ll make a full recovery now.”

“Ah, yes,” Kakashi said with a small wave. “Well I’m glad you made it through alright, Sakura. Make sure you have the mission report on my desk by noon tomorrow.”

“Mission report?” Sakura gaped incredulously. “You were there, why don’t  _ you  _ write it?”

Kakashi merely flicked his wrist in a casual salute before making his way to the window and pulling it open. “Yes, well, see you tomorrow,” he said dismissively.

“Kakashi-sama!” Sakura yelled, trying to make it to the window before he could escape. Unfortunately, her injury was still raw and it caused her a twinge of pain when she made a step too quickly. Kakashi was ducking out the window in a flash, the sight of his silver hair and green flak vest long gone by the time Sakura was leaning out the window and looking in either direction for him.

“Better get on that report, Sakura,” Shizune laughed. “I have to go debrief Tsunade on why the Rokudaime was in the hospital before she hears from someone else.”

Sakura could only stare helplessly as she watched Shizune walk out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! I apologize that this update took so long. I had finals, clinicals, and very limited hours of sleep these past couple of weeks. But the chapter is here, and it's longer than I expected. I originally wanted this to be two chapters, but I think I like it better this way. Who knows!
> 
> Hope you're all safe, happy, and healthy. Thanks for comments in advance!


	6. Bull's Eye

Their genin team was a little bit… unconventional, which says a lot when you’re talking about a group of shinobi. Based upon her many years of medical practice, Sakura knew that shinobi were inherently eccentric, to put it nicely. Something about constantly putting your life on the line and being privy to a lot of sensitive information caused many shinobi to need some sort of outlet, and oftentimes these outlets were particularly unsavory -- even taboo. Some ninja turned to substance use to drown their sorrows, including Tsunade with her sake and Shikamaru with his cigarettes. Others relied on more carnal pleasures, the most infamous of which being the late Jiraiya. Others still could be antisocial, paranoid, and really just downright weird -- Aburame Shino came to mind.

But out of all of the shinobi that Sakura knew, her team definitely took the cake for an assortment of unpleasant character traits. Sakura herself was a monster in the flesh, switching from perfectly contrite to being on a raging warpath in a matter of seconds. She knew it, and everyone knew it, but should anyone ever bring attention to it they’d be on the receiving end of one of her freakish blows. The icing to the cake was that Sakura was  _ also _ a bonafide overachiever, and that was the clinical term. Sakura never went a second throughout her day without doing  _ something _ , whether it was healing a patient or cleaning her house. It was a rare day indeed when Sakura didn’t fall asleep at night not from a desire to relax, but instead from self-imposed exhaustion.

Anko-sensei was an entirely different beast, though she and Sakura shared that particular character trait. When Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke had first met their genin sensei, they were absolutely shocked. Anko was a very beautiful woman, of course, but she was also very brash and even abrasive at times. She had lethal accuracy in all forms of long distance weaponry, and an even more lethal reputation. Anko’s time as the infamous Orochimaru’s pupil was well-known throughout the village, and would have been immediately apparent even if that wasn’t the case. Anko didn’t exactly keep her snake jutsu to herself. But even beyond her general creepiness, Anko might have had one of the more common shinobi vices:  _ sweets _ . Sakura couldn’t even begin to count the number of times she had bought pastries, candy, and other various desserts to placate her sensei. It was safer and less time consuming to just estimate it somewhere in the thousands.

Naruto’s story was much more well-rehearsed. The village pariah turned hero was a tale that Konoha was very much acquainted with, singing Naruto’s praises from every corner of the newly-rebuilt village. And it was a big village. Shinobi and civilians alike attributed the peacetime to Naruto, forever grateful for his dedication and perseverance for not only saving each and every one of them, but also the world. Despite all of this, Naruto kept a pretty cool head. He never considered himself a hero. It would be easy to think that Naruto was well-adjusted with the way he was praised  _ now _ , but those who knew Naruto the best knew that his many years as an outcast and an orphan had taken their toll. Not only did Naruto have trouble with grasping even the most basic of concepts due to his cluelessness, but he also was chronically insecure. This insecurity had led to him conducting an endless number of pranks in his childhood years, but as an adult he often found that there really wasn’t an outlet for that same sort of hyperactivity. Sakura had spent many nights with him before, just trying to calm his restless mind and hoping against all hope that the love she gave him now could make even the slightest dent in all of his years of being hated and ignored.

The newest addition to their team, Sai, had a whole other bout of problems. His might have been the most severe, having been isolated for the greater majority of his life and trained to suppress all emotion from the time he was born. Danzo and his oppressive regime may have been eradicated with the end of the war, but his effect was still felt throughout all of the remaining Anbu ROOT members. Some of the ROOT had disappeared rather than assimilated to normal shinobi life and were presumed dead. Fortunately, Sai had been exposed to love and other wonderful emotions a little bit earlier than his peers, thanks to Naruto. Even so, it took Sai a long time to grasp even the most basic of social concepts, and when he did his execution of them was very clinical and robotic. He was uncomfortable with nearly all forms of intimacy, and shied away from even a pat on the back or a handshake. Sai preferred to hole himself up all day everyday when he wasn’t on missions, sometimes forgetting to eat or sleep as he worked on a painting or sculpture. He had an art studio entirely separate from his apartment, and Sakura suspected that he might have spent a total of one week in his apartment in all the years that he had lived there. It took a tremendous effort to pry Sai from his paintbrush, and once you did he was completely helpless, a newly born fawn in the incredibly complex social world.

As the self-proclaimed  _ least _ emotionally damaged shinobi of her team, Sakura took it upon herself to try to heal the less visible wounds that her teammates held. She did it subtly, whether it was by taking Anko-sensei out to eat something a little healthier than her usual or humoring Naruto in his new hobby of the month -- this month was  _ jewelry making _ of all things. Sakura wanted to make sure that each member of her team could  _ feel _ the love she had for them. Afterall, they had been there for her for as long as she could remember, and in Sasuke’s absence it was more important than ever to her that they  _ never _ questioned their invariable place in her life.

It was for this reason that Sakura and Naruto found themselves in Sai’s apartment this afternoon. Sakura had gone with Naruto to the civilian markets that morning, helping him pick out new beads and wires for him to make his (admittedly ugly) necklaces. She wore one now, a pitiful copper thing with one bright pink bead in the middle surrounded by tangles of wire that were meant to be a lace-like pattern. Only the gods could guess at what interested Naruto in the craft, but there was no denying that he didn’t have a knack for it at all. They had decided to visit Sai on their way back from the shops, Naruto toting a takeout bag and a silver homemade bracelet that Sakura assumed was meant to look masculine but really just appeared to be a smashed soda can. Sai had refused to wear the bracelet, Naruto scowling at him incredulously until Sai finally agreed to wear it for one day and one day only. Now, they were lounging around Sai’s studio with full bellies. Sai was working on a portrait of their team, having strayed back to his easel immediately upon finishing his dinner. Sakura and Naruto laid on the hard floor, forgoing the couch for a much more sprawled out position. It was quiet, the only sounds coming from the birds chirping outside of Sai’s open window. Sakura had opened that window immediately upon entering the studio, unable to withstand the stagnant air that had accumulated in the space after who  _ knows _ how long of Sai making minimal movements and never creating any air circulation.

“Stop moving, Naruto,” Sai ordered from his perch in front of the easel. Even after what was probably hours in front of the canvas, Sakura marvelled at how impeccable Sai’s posture was. “I’m trying to sketch your nose.”

“Why don’t you sketch my ass instead,” Naruto said, promptly rolling over onto his stomach and slapping haphazardly behind him until his hand landed somewhere on his butt.

“Oh, just humor him,” Sakura said with a light kick to Naruto’s side. “Once he finishes we can go with Anko-sensei to the bar.”

Sakura could almost  _ hear  _ Naruto roll his eyes, but even still he obeyed her order and rolled back over with his nose on full display.

“Fine, but you owe me,” Naruto glowered.

He must have been bored, or else he wouldn’t be so  _ obstinate _ . Even with Sai, who could really get on Naruto’s nerves, Naruto was usually pretty agreeable. It took an immense amount of boredom to make Naruto act so flippantly. Sakura tried to ignore him, figuring that he would find something to amuse him soon enough. Hopefully it wasn’t another hideous jewelry piece that Sakura would have to find some polite way of disposing. There were only so many things that she could  _ accidentally _ break.

“Actually,” Naruto said as he sat up. “Why don’t you tell me about what happened after you left Kiri? I got back two days ago and you never told me!”

Sakura scowled up at Naruto’s expectant face, the childlike enthusiasm blatant all over his fox-shaped face. “That’s because you probably already heard,” she said carefully.

Naruto groaned and pinched Sakura’s upper arm, which was exposed from her sleeveless shirt. “Please, Sakura-chan. I heard  _ rumors _ but I wanna hear it from you!”

“Fat chance,” Sakura scoffed. She sat up as well, dusting off her black shorts and turning towards Sai where Naruto couldn’t see her face.

“Oh, c’mon!” Naruto insisted. He put himself back in her line of sight, earning a grunt of protest from Sai as that placed him at an angle where his nose wasn’t as visible. “I heard ya got hurt.” The laugh lingering along the edge of Naruto’s voice was unmistakable.

“Yes, Naruto,” Sakura said with as forceful of an eyeroll she could manage. “The Hokage carried me bridal style into the center of the village and heroically saved me from the pain and suffering of an inadequately healed  _ butt _ bone. Are you happy now?”

“So you broke your ass?” Naruto clarified. He leaned forward expectantly.

“I broke my ass,” Sakura confirmed, right then and there deciding that she wouldn’t be asking Naruto about how the rest of their mission in Kiri went. She would just get it out of Yamato later.

“Would you say…” Naruto began.

“Don’t you dare use the word  _ crack _ , or so help me I’ll fling you through that wall and all the way to the other side of the apartment building.”

After her warning, Naruto looked appropriately horrified. He leaned away from Sakura with wide eyes, lightly coughing to himself as he trained his gaze on Sai’s canvas. Pleased with herself, Sakura smiled and leaned back on her palms. Unfortunately, her pleasure was short lived as her other teammate just found it absolutely  _ necessary _ to ask even more questions.

“Was it the coccyx?” Sai asked. His brush stilled on the canvas as he glanced over at her. Of course, he just had to exercise socially appropriate eye contact when it was at Sakura’s expense.

“No, Sai, that’s lower down.” Sakura explained. She bit her lip to try to quell her rising anger.

“Oh… it wasn’t the ilium was it?” Sai said simply.

“No, Sai, it was the sacrum.” Sakura reached up with a flourish and smacked him on the back of the head. “Seriously, do I need to hide my anatomy texts from you again?”

Naruto laughed. “Might as well, before he gets to the  _ steamy _ chapters.”

Sai countered, “I know more about the  _ steamy _ chapters than you would, Dickless.”

“Are you kiddin’ me?” Naruto said in a shrill tone as he stood up and pointed an accusing finger at Sai. “At least I have a girlfriend! The only girl you know is Sakura, and she doesn’t count.”

“Gee, thanks,” Sakura murmured quietly from the floor.

“You mean Hinata?” Sai asked uninterestedly. He turned back to his painting and began sketching Sakura’s shoulder. “You two barely even talk when you’re together.”

“That’s just because we have a deep connection that doesn’t need any words.” Naruto sniffed.

“Good for you,” Sai said as he finally turned to look at Naruto directly. “I know sometimes it's hard for you to use your brain to form coherent sentences. I’m glad Hinata understands that, as well.”

Naruto’s frowning face turned red as he shoved Sai’s shoulder. “Oh yeah? Well I know sometimes it’s hard for  _ you _ to use your brain and keep your  _ head _ out of your--”

Sai cut him off by abruptly swiping his wet brush across his forehead, leaving behind a pitch black unibrow. “What was that, Naruto?”

Naruto touched his fingertips to his brow and looked down at the inky black paint that was left behind. Without hesitation, he lunged at Sai, ripping the paintbrush from his grasp and tackling him to the ground. Sai fought back, quickly grabbing Naruto’s wrists before he could pull back a punch and then flipping Naruto back onto the ground. They struggled and wrestled around for a bit, but as soon as Sakura could tell that Naruto was opening his mouth to add  _ biting _ to the mix, she intervened.

“Okay, that’s enough you two,” Sakura sighed. She got up from the floor and strode over to the wrestling pair, carelessly reaching her hand down into the tangle of limbs to grab  _ something _ . She pulled with her chakra-enhanced strength and extracted Naruto out from the pile by his arm. He was still trying to land a hit on Sai, which knocked Sakura off balance and sent both her and Naruto backwards onto the couch. After she had regained the air that was knocked out of her, Sakura shifted into an upright position with Naruto’s head in her lap. Immediately she began pinching his cheeks as hard as she could without cutting open his skin with her fingernails.

“Come on, Sai,” she said. “You have to be sensitive to Naruto. He’s Konoha’s national treasure.”

Naruto grunted and tried to pull away, but Sakura kept pinching his cheeks and cooing at him like he was a child. Sai chuckled and strided closer to them, looking down at Naruto with a triumphant, yet still somehow eerie, smile.

The playful moment was interrupted by Sai’s front door swinging open and abruptly slamming against the opposite wall. With the reaction speed that only the most elite shinobi could muster, the three of them leapt apart and hid behind various types of furniture in: Naruto behind the couch, Sai under the coffee table, and Sakura behind the bookshelf. Unfortunately, their efforts were all in vain. Just as soon as they had reached their hiding spots and pulled out their kunai, each of them were pinned to either the floor or the wall by the fabric of their clothes. Sakura looked down to see what had punctured her vest to hold her to the wall, rolling her eyes once she realized it was a dango stick, the sticky syrup still clinging to the wood.

The three of them each groaned and plucked the skewers away from them and onto the floor. As both Naruto and Sai dusted themselves off from being on the floor, Sakura walked over to greet their visitor.

“You do know that you don’t need to do emergency intruder drills on us anymore, right Anko-sensei?” Sakura asked with one eyebrow raised. “We’re all on the same level now.”

“Is that so?” Anko said while inspecting her manicure. “Because I could have sworn that I just pinned each of you down with one projectile, each. It could have easily been a lethal hit.”

While Sakura had to admit that it was impressive that her old sensei could aim  _ perfectly _ at each of them from three different angles of the room, she still wasn’t ready to admit that she wouldn’t have been able to deflect the hit if she really knew she was in danger. Instead, Sakura just rolled her eyes.

“Anko-sensei!” Naruto shouted as he walked over and put an arm around both of them. “How was your mission?”

“You know it’s classified, Naruto,” Sai said even before Anko could answer. “Give her some time to relax.”

“Exactly,” Anko agreed. She slithered out from under Naruto’s arm and clapped her hands together. “And speaking of relaxing, each of you is going to buy me a drink.”

“You still owe us for the past few times,” Sakura groaned. Even so, she began to slip on her shoes with the others and head out the door. 

“And you still owe me for the past ten years of emotional distress trying to whip you all into shape and make you into functioning shinobi,” Anko countered. “Let’s go. It’s time for some target practice.”

Each of them knew exactly what  _ target practice _ really meant: backwards drunk darts at Konoha’s most popular bar for shinobi. Anko wasn’t much of a drinker, but when she did have a little bit of alcohol in her system, it only seemed to enhance her precision when it came to throwing sharp objects. Not only that, but it also made her much more competitive. She would challenge anybody around her to a game of darts, inevitably drinking them under the table and even making off with a good chunk of money at the end of the night. Ninja tended to be a little more loose with their bets once they had a few drinks.

Their team walked together to the bar, which actually was pretty close to Sai’s studio and was part of their motivation to meet there in the first place. Even if Sakura didn’t really enjoy alcohol -- thanks to her many years of tending to Tsunade’s hangovers -- she did enjoy hanging out with her friends and colleagues. She was one of the lucky few shinobi in the village who still had friends to gather with. In the back of her mind, she remembered Sasuke and tried to swallow down her oncoming tears. Tonight wasn’t the night to be sentimental.

When they arrived at the bar, they could immediately tell that it was packed. The sounds of laughter, loud conversations, and even louder music seeped out of the doorway. Anko entered first, loudly announcing herself as she walked in and quickly quieting anyone who groaned with a strong glare. Naruto was close behind, always eager to be one of Anko’s first challengers and inevitably end up sleeping in the corner from how much he drank. Sai and Sakura walked in together, ready to assume their roles as peacekeepers and make sure that their other two teammates didn’t cause a drunken disaster.

Sai drifted over to where Anko and Naruto were gathering near the dart board with a few other jounin, including Kurenai, Hayate, Ebisu, Shikamaru, and even Choji. Sakura was grateful that Sai had wordlessly elected himself to take the first watch over their reckless teammates, because she could clearly see Ino waving her over from the opposite side of the bar. Sakura waved back to confirm that she would be coming over, but first walked over to the bartender to order a drink.

The bartender, a polite old man who had been running the bar since he was young as a family business, smiled at Sakura and held up one finger. Since he was clearly helping someone else, she decided to sit down and eat some of the complimentary peanuts as she waited.

“Hey, Sakura!” someone said from her left.

“Oh!” Sakura exclaimed from around a full mouth. “Hi, Genma, how are you doing?”

Genma shrugged, leaning back against the bar counter as he flipped the senbon in his mouth out of the way to respond. “Ah, you know. The old Hokage is running me ragged. I just can’t wait until it’s Yamato’s turn to be Hokage-sama’s personal servant.”

Sakura grimaced. “Oh, I hope it isn’t  _ that _ bad.”

“That depends,” Genma said with a wink. “Would you consider having sleepless nights on most days of the week  _ that _ bad?”

“Sleepless nights?” Sakura smiled softly at the intended euphemism. “With the Hokage, no less?”

Genma chuckled. “Yeah, but he isn’t the only one, you know?”

Sakura smiled back brightly. She really enjoyed chatting with Genma. He tended to take things way less seriously than most shinobi did, and she could definitely appreciate someone who chose to add light to even the bleakest of situations. Even still, she wasn’t all too surprised whenever he landed himself in the hospital with a bright red bruise on his face after one of his many dates. Some people just didn’t understand that his humor was just that: a joke. Granted, he could be a little more careful when flirting with some of the high society ladies that he found himself with.

“Let me know if you ever need a sleeping pill written up,” Sakura offered. “I’d be more than happy to help you get some sleep.”

“Oh, I don’t have trouble falling asleep, Sakura, but thank you,” Genma said sincerely.

“I don’t mean for you,” Sakura said with a wink. “I meant for the Hokage.”

Genma laughed loudly. “I might have to take you up on that. But first, I see your old sensei is here for a rematch.”

Sakura waved pleasantly as Genma walked away from the bar, and by then the bartender was ready to take her order. Sakura simply asked for a bottle of cheap sake and two glasses that she promptly took over to where Ino was sitting to watch her teammates make fools of themselves challenging Anko. 

“You think they’d learn by now that no one is a match for her,” Ino said with a shake of her head as she accepted the glass that Sakura was offering to her. “Especially Shikamaru.”

“Yeah, I thought he was smarter than that,” Sakura agreed.

At the moment, Anko was showing everyone up by throwing five successive darts behind her head at the dart board, each one splitting through the previous dart and hitting the bull’s eye. Shikamaru was shaking his head woefully as Choji, Naruto, and the rest of the group reached into their pockets to pull out some money. As soon as they were all drunk, Sakura could just tell that it would become even worse.

“So, what’s new with you, Forehead?” Ino asked as she dragged her eyes away from her teammates. “I feel like I haven’t seen you in  _ forever _ !”

Ino wasn’t particularly subtle, and Sakura could immediately tell where she was headed with that line of questioning. To anyone else it may have seemed like a typical question for two friends catching up, but to Sakura who had been avoiding Ino for the past few days it was much more lethal.

“Nothing really,” Sakura stalled. “I did clean out my pantry though. You should have seen the amount of rice I had to throw away. I should really ask Shino how to keep bugs out of that closet when I’m away on missions.”

Ino rolled her eyes. “Ew. You know what I mean. How’s your ass?”

Sakura grinned. “How’s yours? It looks a little bigger than usual.”

“Whatever, Forehead. You know I’ve been doing some glute workouts with Lee and Gai-sensei, so I don’t wanna hear it,” she scoffed. “I  _ mean _ what the hell happened that led to the Hokage carrying you immobilized into the village?”

Despite herself, Sakura laughed. “Oh, that? We got into a spar and he broke my sacrum.”

Ino’s eyes widened. “ _ He _ broke your sacrum?”

Sakura nodded. “Yup.”

“The Hokage touched your ass?” Ino clarified.

“Erm, well, no,” Sakura said as she wiggled in her seat. “Really, it wasn’t anything inappropriate. We were on our way back from Kiri and he asked me to spar. I fell and broke my fall with my butt.”

“Inappropriate?” Ino shrieked. “You still  _ sparred _ with the Hokage! The only person stupid enough to do that is Gai-sensei!”

Sakura tried to quiet her by motioning her palms towards the floor a few times. “You don’t have to go and advertise it to the whole village. The mission was a bust, and I think he just wanted to blow off some steam.”

“When did you two get so comfortable around each other?” Ino asked as she emptied her cup of sake and went to refill it. “Last I knew, you had only met with him a few times. Even less than I have, really!”

Sakura shrugged and let Ino top off her cup. “Comfortable? I wouldn’t call it that. I think he has some kind of vendetta against me.”

“Really?” Ino laughed contritely with her hand over her mouth. “What did you do to piss him off?”

“I think I embarrassed him.” Sakura grinned furtively. “I had to heal him, and I nearly made him take off his pants for it.”

Ino laughed raucously, clutching her belly to try to stifle it. “You’re kidding me! So now he’s trying to exact his revenge?”

Sakura allowed herself to join in with a small giggle, the sake loosening up her smile. “I guess so. I’m just worried, because I think I really annoy him. And I don’t exactly want to be on the Hokage’s bad side.”

“You know what I think you should do?” Ino said, whispering suddenly as she tilted her head towards Sakura and glanced around to make sure that no one was listening in. “You should give it back to him.”

“Give what back?” Sakura wrinkled her nose. “You mean, annoy him even more?”

“I mean, start a prank war,” Ino suggested. “You know, just friendly stuff. But that way he’ll know that you aren’t just going to lay down and take it. He’ll respect you more!”

Sakura hummed, seriously considering Ino’s idea. She had to admit, a few friendly pranks might annoy him, but at least it would show Kakashi-sama that she could be taken seriously -- that she wouldn’t just be any other shinobi that bent to his every will. Sakura could fight back a little. Granted, it wasn’t  _ really _ his fault that she broke a very embarrassing bone, but he definitely got as much out of it as he could. She considered them to be on well-understood terms now, and if she really wanted to stand out and impress him, some innocent pranks just might be the way to do it. Finally, Sakura grinned from over the rim of her glass.

“So you’ll do it?” Ino said excitedly.

“I think I’ll give it a try,” Sakura said. “But you’ll need to help me think of a few ideas. I could ask Naruto, but--”

“But we both know he’s an idiot,” Ino finished for her. “Oh, this is so exciting! I’ll definitely help out.”

After that, they spent a couple of hours throwing prank ideas back and forth. Some of them were pretty silly and ineffectual, especially the later ones as the pair began to run out of sake. Nonetheless, there were a few really good ideas that Sakura decided to file away in her brain for later. Their major concern was  _ how _ exactly to implement some of the pranks. Sakura didn’t exactly come into contact with the Hokage on a regular basis, unless it was for mission debriefings, and no matter how much Ino tried to convince her, Sakura drew the line at giving the Hokage temporary tinnitus while he was trying to give her the basic details of a mission needed for her survival. She figured that she would have to be a little creative with finding excuses to get into the Hokage tower, but that wasn’t a deterrent in and of itself.

Once they had finished their bottle of sake, Sakura decided to excuse herself and make her way home. She did ask Sai if he wanted her to take either Anko or Naruto home, but Sai seemed pretty content with babysitting them. If she didn’t know any better, Sakura would have suspected that Sai was actually enjoying himself. Not willing to begrudge him the entertainment, Sakura simply said her goodbyes and headed out of the bar.

While the bar wasn’t very far from Sai’s studio, it was a pretty long walk back to her apartment. Deciding to speed up the process, Sakura took to the roof of the bar and began to run across Konoha’s rooftops. It was a clear, starry night and Sakura found herself enjoying the light breeze across her sake-warmed face. She truly loved her village, and on nights like tonight where the Hokage monument was lit by the moon and the crickets were chirping a beautiful song, it was incredibly obvious just how  _ much _ she loved it.

Distracted by the scenery and invigorated by the alcohol, Sakura made it back to her quaint little apartment building in record time. She had chosen the small apartment building not for it’s modern appliances or working water heater -- which it certainly did not have -- but instead for its proximity to the hospital. She had managed to make the place pretty comfortable with some sturdy furniture courtesy of Yamato and some particularly beautiful wall hangings courtesy of Sai. Regardless of all of its faults, Sakura was happy to call it home.

As she lowered herself down onto the balcony that belonged to her unit, Sakura caught a flash of white from the corner of her eye. Immediately becoming alert, Sakura put her hand on her weapons pouch and paused to scan the area. Just as soon as her hand settled on her pouch, an Anbu appeared from behind the branch of a nearby tree and lowered himself onto the balcony beside her. The flash of white must have been from his mask.

“The Hokage requests your presence,” the Anbu operative said matter-of-factly, not wasting any time with pleasantries. “It is urgent.”

“Oh,” Sakura said dumbly. “Lead the way.”

She wasn’t sure why he would call for her, but Sakura suspected that she might be in for one of those sleepless nights that Genma had been talking about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while, and this is a crap chapter. HOWEVER I feel like it's necessary for the rest of the story. Take it as you will. Next chapter you'll see a bit of Kakashi's POV, and hopefully it will come sooner than this one did.
> 
> See you next time!


	7. You had me in stitches

The pain was really inconsequential at that point… just something in the very back of his mind that still tugged on his sleeve to be remembered occasionally. Other than that, Kakashi considered himself to be coping fairly well. The really bothersome part of it all, the aspect of his current situation that was  _ truly  _ painful was that fact that no one would simply leave him alone. There were at least seven other people in the room, each of them bustling around anxiously and berating each other and really just talking  _ near _ Kakashi instead of to him. It grated on his every nerve, so much so that it was overstimulating. The constant frantic whispers, harsh fluorescent lighting, pungent odor of antiseptic, and below it all the droning hum that vibrated at such a specific frequency that Kakashi had only ever heard it at the hospital.

People often assumed that he hated hospitals. Well, he supposed it was true enough. Every time he was in a hospital, it was for a grave reason. Why should he enjoy his time there? Wasn’t that kind of counterintuitive? Deep down, however, Kakashi knew it wasn’t the hospital itself that bothered him. He could get over the nasty smell that burned his nostril hairs, the lighting that made him squint, and even the doting nurses. Above it all, he couldn’t stand having to lay  _ motionless _ . Helpless. Surrender himself to the judgement and orders of the medical professionals. He wasn’t used to it, had never been used to it since he was a child soldier and his father had left the world in such an unfair and cruel way. He had always been in charge of his own destiny, for better or for worse.

The hospital was some sort of liminal space. A space where no standard rules, as Kakashi had come to know them, actually applied. A single moment in the hospital could be perceived either as hours, lifetimes, or minutes. Sometimes it felt as though it was taking hours, and other times it was all too quick and he was discharged before he ever even really realized he was injured. It was better when he was still just a jounin, just another shinobi doing his job and being sent on his way. Now that he was the Hokage, it was all much more serious. Only the most qualified staff and doctors were allowed to attend to him, per the council’s orders, and even then an entire Anbu squad would stand guard at all times.

This time, however, Kakashi wasn’t really sure why a simple cut would warrant such treatment. He’d had much worse injuries, and in much worse places. Regardless, it wasn’t up to him. Nothing in the hospital was ever up to him.

_ Except _ … 

And this is when he started to get a really treacherous idea, something that tugged at him even more persistently than the pain. He only had a slight amount of trepidation about it, because really it was one of the best ideas he had ever come up with. But still, something  _ undefined _ and obscure kept him from voicing the order immediately. He wasn’t sure why. It could have been that he didn’t want her to bother him even more than he already was. Or, perhaps,  _ he _ didn’t want to bother  _ her. _ Still, he suspected that it was something else entirely.

Regardless, Kakashi really couldn’t justify ignoring a perfectly good idea. He had seen firsthand the way that the hospital staff respected her, how she was regarded as one of the brightest minds in medicine even by young, naive students. He had even done some digging into her files, read some personal testimonials from past patients and mentors alike and found that she was not only respected in her field, but also  _ feared _ . She had an amazing reputation for tolerating no nonsense, for completely dominating an operating room and being unapologetic for it. She was a genius, for lack of a better word. And if he couldn’t have any control, he might as well hire someone who could take back the control  _ for _ him.

Just as one of the nurses was bending over him with a pair of medical scissors to cut off his shirt and get a better look at his wound, Kakashi placed a gentle hand on her wrist to stop her. She immediately went still, along with the rest of the room, and hesitantly looked at his eyes to see  _ why _ he would refuse treatment. The rest of the room did the same. All that could be heard, beyond the buzzing of the lights and the drone of the hospital, was the shuffling of some of the hospital orderlies’ clothes.

“That’s enough, thank you,” Kakashi said simply. “I’d prefer it if we waited to begin until Haruno Sakura arrives.”

“Haruno-san?” the nurse murmured, her head tilting and brows furrowing. Even still, she backed away and put the scissors back on the surgical tray beside her.

One of the senior medics gently pushed the nurse aside and approached Kakashi. “Hokage-sama, your injuries appear to be very serious. I’m not sure we can wait to find Haruno and for her to even arrive. This isn’t her shift.”

Kakashi appraised the man for only a second, gathering that he was likely offended by Kakashi’s choice in physician. The male ego was a fragile thing, afterall, and he should know. Nonetheless, Kakashi didn’t really look forward to being shuffled around under the care of some man he didn’t even know. Ignoring the medic, Kakashi glanced over his shoulder to one of his Anbu guards and nodded. In less than a second, he had completely disappeared without any indication that he had been there in the first place.

“I appreciate the concern,” Kakashi said. Even as a few of his -- now discarded -- caretakers coughed and shifted uncomfortably, Kakashi reached into his pocket and pulled out an orange book. He tried to move as slowly and smoothly as possible to not jostle the cut on his torso, but even so his movements were stiff and he had to stifle a groan. Once he was as comfortable as he could manage, Kakashi continued. “However, I’m a very patient man. I can wait.”

The senior medic sighed abruptly, put down Kakashi’s chart at the end of his bed and stomped towards the exit of the room. He motioned with his hand for his colleagues to follow him, and wordlessly they all followed, though not without a few hesitant looks behind their shoulders. Only that first nurse remained, having wandered backwards next to the medical cabinets after the senior medic had pushed her away, pen in her shaking hand and stack of papers beside her.

“Um…” she said. “Is it alright if I stay, Hokage-sama? To monitor your condition?”

Without looking up from his book, Kakashi nodded. It was more for the benefit of the remaining Anbu in the room than for the nurse, so that they wouldn’t assume her presence was a breach of confidentiality.

Seemingly emboldened, the nurse straightened up in her stool and set her pen aside. “Then, would you mind if I at least covered the wound? You’re bleeding quite a lot.”

Kakashi sighed, though he assumed he really couldn’t begrudge her that much. Wordlessly, Kakashi shifted so that his left arm was behind his head and he held his book to the side, away from the side of his torso that was apparently bleeding profusely. He couldn’t really feel it.

Taking that as permission, the nurse hastened out of her chair and snapped on a new pair of gloves. She again picked up the medical scissors to cut away his blood-soaked shirt. She didn’t recoil, however, from the strong scent of iron. Instead, she continued on with her work and grabbed a bundle of gauze and bandages to use to attempt to stop the bleeding. From the corners of his eyes, Kakashi tried to identify some semblance of fear or concern in her face, but she was only serious, resolute in her new mission. Kakashi found himself impressed. She was a rather young girl, her features not yet roughened by age, her hair short and blonde. He wondered who trained her, and also if he might be able to recommend her for a promotion.

Before long, the nurse had finished cutting and wrapping the appropriate amount of bandages for his cut. She was now applying pressure, keeping both arms straight in front of her and pushing down with her palms into his ribs. Kakashi could tell that some of his blood was still seeping out from around the bandages, but it was still much less than what he had come in with.

Just as the nurse’s arms were beginning to shake from the continued pressure she was putting on them, Kakashi could sense the chakra signature of the Anbu operative that he had previously sent to find Sakura reappear in his trauma room. The nurse jumped a little, but only went back to applying pressure as if nothing had happened. Almost simultaneously, the door to his trauma room swung open with as much force as the winds of a hurricane, slamming against the opposite wall and leaving behind a rather sizable dent in the wood.

Ah, Haruno Sakura had arrived.

She stormed in, pink hair blowing behind her with how quickly she was moving and flying into the mouth of the senior medic who had been in with Kakashi earlier. He was striding behind her, voice frantic as he tried to placate her and justify himself. He paid no mind to the fact that he was deterring her from getting to her patient.

“He was noncompliant!” the senior medic shouted. “I don’t understand what  _ you _ think you could do better!”

Sakura’s pretty features aligned into a particularly harsh scowl. “Noncompliant? What are you, Ichijou, a vet? He’s not some dog that needs a suppository, he's the Hokage! Mikiko, I’ll take over.”

The nurse, Mikiko, sighed as she backed away and wiped some of the sweat off of her brow. The senior medic crossed his arms from near the foot of the bed.

“If you aren’t going to make yourself useful,” Sakura said as she leaned over Kakashi and pressed on his wound to assess how well it had clotted. “You might as well read me his chart.”

“His chart?” Ichijou huffed. “You’re going to need help.”

“Fine,” Sakura snapped. “Then leave  _ my _ trauma room and go  _ help _ someone else. Mikiko, you can read me the chart. At least  _ you _ had enough common sense to apply a pressure dressing.”

Mikiko shuffled to the end of Kakashi’s bed, shoving Ichijou aside as she reached for the chart. Ichijou gaped for a moment, completely aghast, before he finally turned around with a flourish and slammed the door behind him.

“Vitals, please,” Sakura ordered, though both her tone and face were much softer now that Ichijou was gone. “From the beginning, Mikiko.”

As the nurse spouted off a string of numbers relating to Kakashi’s blood pressure and pulse oximetry, Kakashi took a moment to study Sakura’s face. Just as he had predicted, she had immediately taken charge from the moment she entered the room. Even now that she was more calm, she was very much in her element. She hadn’t even made eye contact with Kakashi since her appearance. Instead, she was completely focused on carefully removing the gauze from his torso and quelling the bleeding. Her brows furrowed as she absorbed the information that Mikiko was reciting from the chart, but her work never stilled. Sakura worked quickly and resolutely.

Finally feeling somewhat at ease, Kakashi nodded his head and each of his Anbu guards disappeared. He knew they would be close by, watching his every move, but at least they wouldn’t be suffocating him with their intense stares.

“Okay, Mikiko, prep the lidocaine,” Sakura said once Mikiko had finished getting her up to speed. “I won’t be able to heal all of this, so we’ll need to do stitches. You should also go finish the charting at reception, I might be a while.”

Mikiko nodded, dutifully depositing the chart back at the end of Kakashi’s bed and shuffling out of the room.

“Hokage-sama?” Sakura asked softly once the nurse had left.

“Hm?” he hummed, not bothering to look up from  _ Icha Icha _ .

“What the hell happened?” she said. The typical, angry inflection was there, but underneath it all Kakashi could detect a certain tremble to her voice. It was subtle, just a quiver to her lips that sent the vibration of her words to be only slightly discordant. Nonetheless, it was enough for him to detect, and he could only wonder where the concern came from. It was just a simple cut.

“Meh, it’s classified,” Kakashi said flippantly. He wasn’t trying to irritate her -- no,  _ really _ \-- he just wanted to downplay the incident so that she would hopefully stop worrying. He could tell from the two little lines right underneath her yin seal that she was blowing it all out of proportion.

Kakashi’s attempts to soothe her worries, however, were in vain. Rather than breathe a sigh of relief, Sakura huffed forcefully enough that it blew a strand of her hair out of place and over her eye, her shoulders raising and dropping like she was trying to get in enough breath before unexpectedly being submerged underwater.

“I’ll tell you what  _ isn’t _ classified, then, Hokage-sama,” Sakura snapped. “You have a ten-inches long avulsion spreading from your sternal notch all the way to your left intercostals. If it were any deeper it would be invading the pleural space, and you probably wouldn’t be able to breathe. I’ve got about half a liter of blood here, so I suspect you’re experiencing some dizziness and nausea. Which, of course, isn’t in your chart so I’m willing to bet you’ve been downplaying your symptoms from the very beginning. Am I right?”

Deciding that her observations warranted a sideways glance away from his reading, Kakashi eyed her to assess her level of irritation. All that he could see was that her face was entirely red and that her scowl had completely removed all of the usual prettiness from her face. Estimating her anger to be somewhere between  _ Naruto and Yamato just let a child fall from a tree _ to  _ there’s an assassin trying to kill the Hokage _ , Kakashi closed his eyes. 

“At least you didn’t inherit your gambling skills from Tsunade,” Kakashi said softly.

Sakura growled, even as she placed her hands over his cut and began pouring out her chakra to repair the damage -- an angel and a monster all rolled into one. “That’s all you have to say for yourself? I can order for a couple bags of O-neg for your blood loss, and I can heal your cut and send you on your way. But imagine how devastated  _ your _ village would be if you didn’t learn for next time that downplaying your injuries can get you killed. And I know Ichijou is a complete ass, but letting him heal you wouldn’t have been the worst thing in the world. And while we’re at it, your posture is  _ deplorable _ ! How you even manage to walk around--”

“Sakura,” Kakashi interrupted.

“What?” she seethed with a sharp look in his direction. Her anger was absolutely pouring out of her ears. He could feel the heat radiating off of her even as her medical ninjutsu cooled the area around his injury.

“You’re rambling,” he surmised 

“ _ Excuse _ me, then!” she shouted. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Hokage-sama, but I was just disrupted from my rather pleasant evening to come  _ save _ your ass in the middle of the night and I don’t even know what happened. Was there some sort of attack on the village?”

Kakashi flipped his book closed and slid it back into his pants pocket. With the hand that had previously been holding  _ Icha Icha _ , he lightly grazed Sakura’s hands that were pressing on his chest. She jolted.

“If I tell you what happened,” he began. “Do you promise to calm down?”

Sakura nodded sharply. She pressed her lips together, and suddenly her face smoothed and all traces of anger had left her body. She breathed a small sigh.

“It was part of an Anbu recruitment exercise,” Kakashi explained. “I didn’t want to tell you, because most shinobi of your calibre consider joining eventually.” He could tell she was about to interrupt him as her mouth opened and she met his eyes, but he stopped her by squeezing her hand. “I like to observe the trials so that I might familiarize myself with the new recruits and pass my judgement on whether or not someone passes. This time, Ibiki suggested that I use a kage bunshin for the new recruits to  _ protect _ from an unknown force.”

“An unknown force?” Sakura asked.

“All fake, don’t worry,” Kakashi said. “There was no real threat to the village, but Ibiki wanted them to  _ think _ that I was in danger, with their objective to protect me. I wanted to observe myself, so I didn’t use a clone. Then, there was one bad throw of a kunai, and that landed me here.”

Sakura nodded as she worried her bottom lip between her teeth. “That was very dumb of you.”

Kakashi smiled despite himself, his eyes crinkling over his mask. “It was.”

“It was just a training exercise?” she clarified.

“Just a training exercise.”

The air around them became thick with silence, the seriousness of their conversation permeating in the room like a dense cloud. Sakura had obviously been worried, and Kakashi could only guess at the depths of her anguish. Was she concerned as a Konoha shinobi? Or was it something else, a past memory that was reignited by seeing him in a hospital bed that had nothing to do with him at all? Kakashi himself had many memories like that, and it would probably benefit him to try to forget them. He never could. He carried those memories with him like they were precious momentos and not painful reminders of mistakes he made and people he had lost. He wondered if Sakura had memories like that, as well.

It was different. Their usual encounters were filled with light banter and jokes back and forth. This situation, where he was injured and she was berating him for not being more careful, was foreign territory. Kakashi did not consider himself a social butterfly by any means, but he had previously thought that he had gotten to know Sakura -- on a surface level, at least. He could predict her jokes, knew what set her off. Now, it was like she was an entirely different person. Ferocious, still, but somehow also calm and gentle. He was wary of it, and it caused him to take his hand off of hers and place it back on the bed beside him.

Eager to offset the tension in the room, Kakashi decided to speak up. He opened his mouth to say something about that nurse, Mikiko. However, before he could even utter his first word, Sakura had obviously decided to relieve the disquiet, as well.

“Are you a pervert?” she asked. She wrinkled her nose up -- as if she had smelt something horrible rotting in the back of her fridge -- and turned her head to look at him. His wound was healing very quickly now, going from a large gash in his torso to a much more shallow laceration. She only needed one hand to continue healing him, and her other hand was resting insolently on her hip.

“Excuse me?” he replied. “I’m lying here half naked and you’re asking  _ me _ if I’m the pervert?”

“I’m  _ healing _ you,” she said with a roll of her bright eyes. “No, I mean I saw what you were reading.”

“How astute of you,” Kakashi said. He tried to resist the urge to sniff petulantly and turn his head away, but he failed.

“You know, Naruto is my teammate,” Sakura explained. As she talked, she took her hand from off of Kakashi’s abdomen and turned away from him to walk to the medical cabinets. From the corner of his eye, he watched her as she pulled out a suture kit and more gauze. Although her words were cutting, she was focused and even tranquil in her task. “He studied under the man who wrote that filthy porn.”

Kakashi hummed. “He should consider himself lucky. Jiraiya was a great man.”

Sakura turned around with a flourish, all of her supplies in hand as she rolled her eyes and walked back towards Kakashi. “He was. I’m just saying I know exactly what’s in that book you’re reading, and it isn’t very becoming of a Hokage.”

“So you’ve read them?” Kakashi asked. He watched as she laid out all of the supplies beside her and pulled a stool up to his bedside.

“I never said that,” she clarified. “You’re the one who was reading an erotic novel in a life or death situation.”

Kakashi tried to shrug, but with his hand still behind his head it didn’t have the same effect. “It’s soothing, like fine art.”

Sakura fixed him with a blank stare. “I wonder what the other nations would think if they knew that our Hokage is a bonafide pervert.”

“I think Mei already knows,” Kakashi said.

That earned him a small laugh. Sakura had just begun to dispose of the bloody gauze and bed sheets that were around him, and as she did so her entire face lit up with a giggle. Her bright eyes crinkled, and her mouth split open into such a pleasant grin that Kakashi forgot what her scowl looked like.

“That’s right,” Sakura snorted. “One down, only three more to go.”

“I’ll just have to take you with me on every diplomatic mission,” Kakashi said. “I’m sure you’ll find some way to embarrass me.”

“I think I could manage,” Sakura said with a conspiratory wink. She placed a sanitary drape over Kakashi’s wound and carefully cut out a hole big enough for her to see the laceration. Then, she glanced at the clock. “I think Mikiko got held up with the lidocaine. I’ll just numb you with chakra.”

“Maybe you scared her away,” Kakashi mused. “You did come in with a pretty angry look on your face.”

Sakura frowned. “I like Mikiko, she’s one of our best nurses. I think your  _ book _ scared her away.”

Sakura began cleaning the area around the cut with a cotton swab and iodine solution. Now that the majority of the pain was gone, Kakashi could tell how sensitive and raw his newly healed skin was.

“Are you sure you can’t use medical ninjutsu for the rest?” Kakashi asked.

“Oh, now you’re going to be a baby?” Sakura scoffed. “I could, but I’m also incredibly tired and probably still slightly intoxicated. If I healed you entirely, I might not be able to get myself home without passing out.”

Kakashi raised one thin eyebrow and leaned away as her gloved hands came towards him with the needle and forceps. “You’re drunk?”

Sakura glared and held her instruments tightly. “Not really. The idea of my Hokage being on the brink of death sobered me up enough to work. Now shut up and let me do your sutures!”

Kakashi conceded, figuring that if she had gotten this far without revealing that she was under the influence, then she must not be too far impaired to finish his medical care. He watched carefully as she maneuvered the needle through his skin, all the while letting one pinky from her left hand drift along his skin to send chakra throughout the area. The chakra was just enough to numb him, so that all he could feel was the slight tingling of medical ninjutsu instead of the piercing needle.

“Did Tsunade teach you that?” Kakashi asked, surprised at how deftly she handled both the sutures and the small medical ninjutsu all at once. It appeared simple at first glance, but Kakashi couldn’t even imagine the amount of practice she would have had to have done to manage a skill like that.

“No,” Sakura shook her head. A strand of hair fell out from behind her ear as the medical instruments in her hands clinked together. “Well, she taught me the sutures. But Tsunade-shishou always had a very battlefield-oriented medical technique. If it couldn’t be done efficiently and quickly, it wasn’t done at all. I added numbing chakra to sutures during the war. It just seemed unfair to make people go through even more pain after everything that happened. It’s silly, but it was important to me.”

Kakashi nodded. “That’s very compassionate of you.”

Curiously, Kakashi noticed Sakura blush and her hands still for a fraction of a second. “Anyone could have thought of it, and probably has,” she said. “I just was determined to do it, and to learn it quickly in the field. Tsunade called it a waste of chakra.”

More and more, Kakashi was learning things about Sakura that seemed so trivial, so small in comparison to her entire person. Regardless, he found that he was beginning to have a better understanding of her. The person who had initially been a nuisance to him, was now a compassionate, skilled, hardworking, and  _ tempestuous _ shinobi. He wasn’t sure how he felt about it.

“Is this an age spot?” Sakura suddenly asked. She had deposited the needle and forceps back onto the surgical tray and was now pointing at a spot on his chest with her pinky.

Kakashi took it back. He knew  _ exactly  _ how he felt.

“It’s a birthmark,” he muttered. He moved to put his arm back down and sit up, but Sakura stopped him with her palm on his chest.

“No, wait,” she said with a slight giggle. “I think it’s an age spot! Are you wrinkling under that mask already? And your hair is so  _ white! _ ”

Gently, Kakashi took her wrist and pushed her hand away. “If you would stop harassing your Hokage, I think I’ll be on my way now. Thank you for your services.”

“Wait!” Sakura said. She held out her hands to stop him from getting up. Once he paused and she was sure that he wouldn’t move, she pressed on his shoulder to make him lean back into the bed once more. “I have to put a bandage on over your stitches so that you don’t tear them out.”

“What makes you think I would tear them out?” he grumbled.

“Considering the fact that you sat at your desk chair for an entire day with a dislocated hip, I don’t exactly have much faith in your ability to heed medical advice,” Sakura said. With one hand still on his shoulder to hold him down, Sakura began to apply a large adhesive bandage over the area with the stitches. “Still, I feel obligated to tell you that you should avoid stretching or irritating the area. Also, you have to come back in about a week to have the stitches removed.”

Once she finally released his shoulder, Kakashi considered that to be permission for him to sit up again. He lifted himself up and swung his legs over the side of the hospital bed to look at Sakura head on. Now that he was sitting, she had to look up to glare at him.

“Yes, doctor,” Kakashi deadpanned. “Anything else?”

Sakura snapped off her gloves, setting them on the tray beside her and folding her arms. “Yes, actually. I’ll be stopping by your office  _ daily _ to monitor the healing process.”

Before he could protest, Kakashi noticed the chakra signature of one of his Anbu guards appear behind him. To her credit, Sakura didn’t flinch. She merely glanced over his shoulder and then back at Kakashi to continue gifting him with that challenging glare.

“What is it?” Kakashi said without looking back.

“There’s an urgent mission request from the Daimyo,” the Anbu guard explained. “We just received a messenger hawk.”

Kakashi sighed. “Speak freely. I’ve just raised Haruno’s security clearance.”

One of Sakura’s eyebrows peaked, but she didn’t say anything.

The Anbu guard didn’t hesitate, he merely followed orders. “The Fire capital has been infiltrated by a band of rogue ninja. The Daimyo requests a small team of some of your most elite shinobi to help him extricate the intruders. He mentioned a few people by name.”

Kakashi exaggeratedly rolled his eyes, and then looked at Sakura with a pleading look. With just a look, he tried to express to her just how  _ annoying  _ the Daimyo could be. She seemed to understand. The corner of Sakura’s mouth lifted in a small smile, even as her arms remained crossed.

“Send them immediately,” Kakashi ordered. “Let them know I expect mission updates every few days. They’ll leave in the morning.”

“Hokage-sama,” the Anbu guard said, pausing for a moment. “He requested Genma, Shikamaru, Yamato, and Shizune.”

For the first time since the Anbu operative arrived, Kakashi turned around to look behind him. Predictably, the Anbu was as impassive as always, all expression and body language hidden beneath his black cloak and white mask. Of course, Kakashi knew who hid behind the mask, but he couldn’t exactly reveal any personal information to shout at the Anbu operative in front of Sakura.

“All of them?” Kakashi asked.

“Yes.”

Kakashi heaved a deep sigh and looked back at Sakura. He could tell from the way her lips were pursed that she was dying to say something, but she refrained. He considered for a moment, and then finally gave his order.

“If that’s who the Daimyo wants, send them,” Kakashi said. “You’ll also need to tell Tsunade.”

“What should I tell her?” the Anbu guard asked. He was already kneeling down with his hand on his knee, prepared to leave and deliver the message.

“Let her know that she’ll be losing Haruno Sakura in her hospital for a while,” Kakashi said. “She’ll have to take over as my advisor for the time being.”

“ _ Excuse me? _ ” Sakura exclaimed. She stood up from her stool and reached out an arm towards the Anbu guard. “Hang on a minute, we have to talk about this!”

It was too late. After hearing his order, the Anbu disappeared in the matter of one blink. Sakura stood with her arm outstretched towards empty air. Kakashi patted her on the shoulder.

“You said you wanted to monitor my condition daily,” Kakashi said. “This just makes it easier.”

“Do you hate me or something?” Sakura asked bluntly. She stepped away from Kakashi and stared at him dubiously.

“Meh, of course not,” he said with a wave of his hand. “All of my advisors were just sent away on a very important and dangerous mission, and I entrusted you to take their place while they’re gone.”

“You’re kidding me, right?” Sakura said. “I’m not an  _ assistant _ . I’m a shinobi, and when I’m not away on missions I keep this hospital running.”

“That’s why I sent a message to Tsunade,” Kakashi said simply. He glanced around the room, searching for something but only coming up with bloody gauze and bare countertops. “You don’t happen to have an extra shirt here do you?”

“You’re punishing me for calling you old,” Sakura accused. She stayed standing in the middle of the room even as Kakashi got up and started pilfering through the cabinets. “It was a joke, I swear!”

“Not even a spare uniform?” Kakashi mumbled. “What kind of hospital is this?”

“Look at me!” Sakura shouted.

Kakashi stilled and looked over his shoulder from where he was rifling through one of the cabinets above the sink. Sakura was standing there with her palms out and an incredulous look on her face.

“Why did you ask for me?” she said helplessly, a vulnerable look written all over her face.

Kakashi couldn’t tell whether she was talking about earlier that night, or if she was talking about him volunteering her for the position of interim assistant to the Hokage. Either way, he answered, “I trust you.”

This silenced Sakura. She lowered her arms to her sides and pressed her lips together.

“Now, will you help me find a shirt so we both can get out of here?” he pleaded with a puppy-eyed look copied straight from Pakkun.

Sakura nodded wordlessly and strided straight to the last cabinet that Kakashi hadn’t yet looked through, the one directly to his right, and began feeling for what she was looking for. Before long, she pulled out a folded piece of fabric and placed it in Kakashi’s hands.

“This has ducks on it,” Kakashi observed.

“And turtles,” Sakura added.

In one movement, Kakashi let the piece of fabric unfurl and flow down towards the ground. He lifted it up in front of Sakura’s face. “This is a child’s hospital gown.”

Sakura shrugged. “You wanted something to cover you, this will cover you.”

“I wanted a shirt,” Kakashi said. He shook the offending bit of fabric in front of her. “This is not a shirt.”

“And I wanted to sleep well tonight,” Sakura said. “We can’t all get what we want, Hokage-sama.”

After she said that, Sakura swung towards the door to the hospital room and began to walk away. With the door half-closed behind her, she waved at Kakashi. 

As soon as the door clicked shut, Kakashi called back. “You’ll report to my office tomorrow morning!” 

From somewhere beyond the door and down the hallway, Kakashi could have sworn he heard a laugh. He chose to ignore it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter! Look, I updated after less than a week! Please be proud of me.
> 
> Does anyone have any good recommendations for kakasaku fics? I feel like I've read the majority of the popular ones, and I'd like a new fic to read! Even if it isn't exactly kakasaku, anything that includes either Kakashi or Sakura is interesting to me! Let me know of your favorites.


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